Escape is not an Option
by SparrowCries
Summary: The moment a tribute steps onto that stage their fates are decided, dead or alive you can never really escape the Hunger Games. It is about time these tributes learn that the hard way.Third story in Blood Trail Trilogy.
1. Chapter 1 Out with the Old

**_Chapter One: Out with the Old, In with the New_**

_Let no one weep for me, or celebrate my funeral with mourning; for I still live, as I pass to and fro through the mouths of men -Quintus Ennius_

CAPITOL: Yttrium, 30

Slowly walking, heart racing in anticipation, and trembling slightly. All the signs of a dead man walking to his grave stood out like beakers on the man. What was he to do when the two large men enter his home requesting him to come with them to go to see President Snow? They were there to make sure he came and didn't escape; he was going to die soon. He knew it. He heard stories; he knew what happened to the last Gamemaker that came before him. It is early along enough that Arena really hasn't started to be built or even had a finished blueprint of it, they could replace him with a snap of fingers with no consequences and he knew it.

Yttrium just couldn't bring himself to be able to walk to his death prideful. He was a shameful mess.

"Right this way." One of the men says to him opening a door with the two of them on each side of it waiting for him to enter the room to his death. They didn't call him sir either? Any other time he would be enraged they didn't treat him with even the respect of calling him Mr. Jones or Sir. He knows why they are so informal though Why respect someone about to be killed for failing to please Snow? To them he is just dirt.

He stands frozen for a moment, grim thoughts still flashing through his thoughts as the men both harshly shove him through the door. It is Snow's garden, roses of all shade laced the walls and grew towards the ceiling magnificently their thrones the only thing acting as anything to remind Yttrium of there danger. He could fall into one of these bushes and Snow would probably just watch him struggle. The thought runs a shiver down his spine as he shuffles towards Snow who is sitting in a seat admiring his roses.

When the President notices the Gamemaker he doesn't smile or wave him forward.

"You have failed me." He says looking towards him those cold stern unloving eyes staring right into Yttrium. He was a whimpering fool now.

"I know Sir." He says going from honor of being Head Gamemaker whittled down to a pathetic fool so quickly.

"Last year you sent an assistant to pitch me the Arena idea." He says. Yttrium hasn't not regretted that one-minute of the day since it happened. "I told her that I wasn't pleased with the amount of days the Games lasted for the 60th, told her it needed to be at least twelve days. Now tell me how long did the Games last?" He asks never breaking that deadly stare.

"Nine." Squeaked Yttrium.

"Not twelve." He says. "Now that assistant of yours- Xia- knows I said twelve. I know she told you twelve yet still you disrespect me." Snows growls and Yttrium nearly falls to the ground ready to beg and beg for mercy while he knows the likely hood of him managing to wretch some kind of mercy from this merciless man would be impossible.

"I am so sorry." Yttrium pleads.

Snows groans, "Such a weak man you are. Maybe a while ago I would allow you to go on giving you one last chance, even though you don't deserve one. But my son has married to a woman whose father is also in a position of high power. Not only does her father love the Games but so does his daughter also. I can't have anything even going slightly wrong this year, I want to go all out this year to bless their marriage." He says.

Yttrium nods, he knew how much pressure there would be. "I can make the best Arena you have ever see."

"Yes but I know very well who was the brains last year, who came up with the idea. Your assistant, maybe I shall give the job to her." Snow says the smirk on his face, it is obvious to even the panicked man that he is toying with him.

"Please let me live." Yttrium cries falling to his knees sobbing.

"See the thing is, I don't think you deserve to live." Snows says still perched on his chair looking as powerful as ever as the two men pick of the sobbing man by his arms dragging him away. He kicks and tries to squirm free but he is no match.

_No this can't be happening! _Yttrium thinks to himself. But it is, this is happening. He will die. They will kill him just as Snow finds fit.

They say no tribute escapes the Arena. Oh they are oh so right, no tribute truly escapes. Even Victors can never rid the ghosts of their time in the Arena. But they are forgetting about a group of people. People like Yttrium himself who has suffered through so much stress and aggravation to try and please the President in hope he would not be slaughtered. The thing is even Gamemakers can't escape the grasps of the Games.

Escape just isn't an Option.

* * *

CAPITOL: Xia, 25

It has been ten days since I received the card. A card that unraveled my future and pushed me into a whole new world full of wealth and anything I could possibly imagine. All it took to get me there is the death of my former employer Yttrium. The first day I couldn't stop shaking. What a year to start off, all this pressure with the President's son being married and all to such a huge fan.

I wanted to sink into that mattress and never appear again.

When I was a little girl I dreamed of that day, when it came I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't want this job like _that. _There was no option though. I am Head Gamemaker now and I needed an idea that would put this Arena above the last few ones. But how?

Over those five days after my little, "Day off" I watched anything I could, searching for any sort of inspiration that could light the way to actually surviving to the next year.

Then like a light bulb suddenly appeared over my head in a moment of inspirational glory I managed to gather an idea possibly crazy in to work. The budget for the Arena was much higher and that made it possible. That was Day Six and over the last four days to today I plotted feeling worse for each trap I planned to bring death to all those kids.

There was no choice though; this was the only option I had. We never really are given choice. We don't choose whom we are born to, or where, or in what situation we are born to. It just falls together and is decided by someone of higher position. See it has become that choices are done by those above you, and the choices you make are for those below you. How magnificent it must be to be someone of highest power to actually have a chance to make your own decision and how miserable it must be to be of the lowest power and decide nothing at all except if you will have the will to go on.

Today I stand with a folder in hand trying to stand tall and not break down, as I get ready to pitch my idea like I did a year ago. One now I have moved up the ranks, yet I still feel utterly powerless even when twenty four children's lives are decided by me.

"Sir?" I ask trying to get Snow's attention. He separated his glance from a paper on his desk up at me giving me a twisted smile that was in no way something of joy. This wicked man doesn't have joy. Maybe when he is able to express his power, but that is not real joy in my eyes. That is something diabolical. That is something much more sickening that I fear I will develop. That outcome will come from choices though and naturally I will not make those choices. Not until the very last one, the choice to embrace the emotion.

I fear if it gets to that point I won't be able to say no to taking on that side of me I have tried so hard to push down.

"I have the pitch for the upcoming Arena." I tell him feeling squeamish.

"Place it on my desk." He orders calmly. I nod placing it on the elegant desk and go back to standing tall my hands behind my back.

"Would you like me to give you a summary of it sir?" I ask trying to hold my manners. I was in the same position last year, but then I was younger. Less experienced. Scared. My wisdom has grown since then (or so I like to believe).

"Go ahead," He says staring at me making me want to do anything but hold his stare.

"I wanted to make it grand, something to celebrate the marriage of your son. So I decided just one Arena wouldn't be enough." Now I have his attention. "I was thinking it could be an array of different Arenas. They would start off at one place and after four people die it would trigger a reaction to bring a train to transport them to the next Arena." I tell him.

He nods his head, "Not much of a bloodbath then." He says. "And if they decide to not get on this train?"

"All excellent questions. Well the train would come when the Anthem would play and if they don't leave lets just say they won't last long." I say forcing myself to smirk after that. I sound like a maniac. But who cares?

He nods. "Not too bad for your first Arena." He says. "But it can't just be not too bad, this Arena is of great importance to me. I need it to be great." He tells me

"It will be." I respond to him.

"It better, or you might not get a chance of redemption." He says and I give a sullen nod. My first year and I am already being threatened with the possibility of death.

* * *

_War does not determine who is right- only who is left -Bertrand Russel_

* * *

A/N- First thing, chapters will be much longer. Second thing, I write in first-person usually it just so happened I choose third-person for that first part of the intro.

OK so just a quick introduction to myself. This is my fourth story, fourth SYOT. I have learned a lot of things from my past stories so I do have some experience. If you want to see how I write check out my other stories though a clearer update of how this story will go in terms of quality would be to read Every Man for Himself. This would be a third story in a sort of trilogy. References will be made and past Victors from my story will be mentioned but you don't have to read the other stories to understand this one. And you can call me Sparrow (naturally that is not my real name though)

Rules-

-EVERYONE CAN HAVE ONE TRIBUTE AND ONE BLOODBATH TRIBUTE: You don't have to have a bloodbath but it does help the chances of your tribute surviving. The only way you can have two tributes and one not be a bloodbath is if they are connecting in some way.

-NO SUES! This isn't first come first, so try to make the quality of your tribute high.

-EVEN BLOODBATHS NEED TO HAVE FORM AND HAVE QUALITY, after all I have to write for them up to the bloodbath. And not everyone Bloodbath has to be weak! Also careers can't be bloodbaths, sorry but I have my reasons.

-REVIEW; If you want your tribute to even have a chance you need to review, sorry it is only fair.

-PM TRIBUTES TO ME: No tributes through review! And please use my form only

-NO RECYCLED TRIBUTES: Your tribute must be original and only for this story. Trust me I will find out and your tribute won't have a chance.

-IF YOUR TRIBUTE IS FROM DISTRICT ONE, TWO, OR FOUR THEY HAVE TO BE A CAREER: Once again sorry but I have my reasons

The form is on my profile; this syot will be very legal in terms of rules. So only pm tributes I will ignore any tribute that is through review!

And yes I know according to cannon they said who the Victor was for the 62nd Hunger Games but for different reasons this will be the 62nd anyway.

District One

F: Ecstasy Rapture, 16 _Dramatic Gleek_

M: Burgundy "Burg" Platt, 17 _ATaleTale_

District Two:

F: Alexis Ryker, 18 _richards25_

M: Malice Alen

District Three:

F: Mae Juniper, 17 _KicktotheTeeth_

M: Jean Adric, 16 _Chaos in her Wake_

District Four:

F: Monica Davenport, 18

M: Caleb Depths, 18 _ProjectInitiates_

District Five:

F: Fennec Gray, 14 _mangesboy01_

M: Aeron Than, 17 _theRyden96_

District Six:

F: Cara Meridius, 18 _SweetNature_

M: Elian Coen, 14 _Oryans12_

District Seven:

F: Lily Excavase, 16 _.Cassie_

M: Mason Excavase, 16 _.Cassie_

District Eight:

F: Enya Mathioas, 15 _Pika and Olive's Adventure_

M: Than Jerralds, 18 _Stalking Dream_

District Nine:

F: Rosie-Anne Herandez, 12

M: Micah Trace, 16 _Oryans12_

District Ten:

F: Corrie Rivers, 18

M: Cavallo Hernadez-Caballos, 18

District Eleven:

F: Akua Scintillant, 15 _The Dramatic Gleek_

M: Harsh Greene, 17 _NorthEastChild_

District Twelve:

F: Ash Kelley, 17 _Hollow Places_

M: Everest Tames, 18 _Sparrowcries_


	2. Chapter 2 The Chosen: Reapings Part One

_A friend who dies, it's something of you who dies._

_-Gustave Flaubert_

* * *

**_A/N: Just something to help you, when there is a page separator the pov is only changing if it says the District and name of the new person whose pov is being written_**

**The Chosen: Reapings Part One**

**District Three**

**Jean Adric, 16**

Many people have a very solid black or white point of view on the citizens of the Capitol. Most from my District hate them. The Capitol citizens themselves and those from the Career Districts often love the Capitol. Then there are the others who just could care less.

Me?

In many ways I would very much like to hate the Capitol. For starters they do enforce the horrific event that is the Hunger Games. That is definitely not something in their favor. On the other hand they are humans. They watch and cheer on the Hunger Game, part of me can understand the action and dram part of it but the death part is just sick, yet why can they possible be okay with it? People die for their entertainment.

Since the first moment I realized how strongly the citizens of the Capitol can love the bloodshed that is the Hunger Games I treated it like anything else I don't understand, I analyzed it. Those emotions aren't just something they are born with. I don't know why more haven't questioned that, maybe because the answer is so utterly simple. We all are humans even if the Capitol wears a rainbow assortment of clothes and dye their hair and skin different colors that aren't even possible. They are still humans. Not some sort of different species. Even if they treat us like we are a whole different species and they look like a whole different species.

Since they were born they were raised to believe that what they were doing was right. Just as Careers are raised in similar way, that fighting through to Victory would bring you honor and not just tragedy. Capitol citizens are just people brainwashed from the very moment they are born. They can't control that or control the fact they were born in the Capitol and we weren't. I don't love them or think of the highly. I just pity that the will never be able to think for themselves.

But I also fear them. Which leaves me with a rather peculiar standpoint on my opinion of them all. Not black or white.

Besides I can't hate them. I just can't manage the idea of being filled with such hate. Hate is simply wasted emotion. I meant not always be fond of a certain person makes sense, but hate? No. I just simply try to understand their reasoning behind their actions. I accomplish much more that way.

Sadly it seems people just can't love my company as much as I enjoy theirs.

Letting out a heavy sigh I move away from the window that outlooks District Three. The place is in no way perfect but it is my home, it has my family, and it is the place where I can be taught and get a good education. Since Three is in charge of inventing and engineering being smart is something accepted and not a trait people hide. The most social butterflies here usually are the top-students.

Turning around I remind myself of the upcoming Reaping and check the time. Eleven o'clock and the reaping is at noon. Giving a disappointed shake of the head at myself I almost feel the urge to laugh at it. I always am thinking or lost writing something new. It would make you think I was some idealistic dreamer but the most sullen part of my strong-willed opinions, philosophy, and poetry that I have grown to love is the fact I am not really an idealistic at all. Frankly I am probably more down than Earth than any of my siblings.

I mean I do love them, but my younger sister Aislyn and my older sister Tauriel have their moments. Then again as mature as Aislyn acts she is just a thirteen year-old after all.

"Jean mom made breakfast!" Speak of the devil. I am not poor. I am not rich. I am not high middle class. My parents both work hard enough to kept us fed and at one time so did my sister. We have tesserae but not too much tesserae. The situation so many citizens of Three find themselves in. We really aren't as bad as Twelve or Ten, not even in the same realm, but I still find myself lucky for the situation I have been born into. It isn't perfect but it is my life. The only thing to dislike is the house could definitely use various repairs and a more selfish part of me fears how crowded it might get soon enough.

Still with all of that my mother rarely finds the time to make a real proper breakfast. The Reaping is one of those rare days she makes time

Throwing on my reaping clothes quickly not wanting to eat a cold breakfast I rush out of my room and down the hall to the kitchen. Smiling at my family already scattered around the room eating I retrieve my own plate. My sister's stomach grows every single day. I believe it has been six months now. Three more months and her and Tyndall's baby will be born.

My sister is not a stupid girl. She was always much better with social skills than me as Aislyn is also but Tauriel always was flirty and after three years of dating Tyndall one thing must have led to the next and before we knew it she told us she was pregnant. I know I don't have to worry about her setting a bad example for Aislyn though. Tauriel is intelligent but Aislyn is like a mad scientist. Much more outgoing and she was always a scientist at heart. My favorite thing about my sisters though is that they were given the gift to be so much less socially awkward then me.

* * *

"Good luck brother." Little Aislyn tells me giving me a tight hug before we part ways. Her words fill me with warmth but I know very well I will need more than just good luck. Each year gets more nerve-racking as my name is put in more and more.

The escort Ty steps onto the stage. He used to be so cheerful and colorful but lately he is much more twitchy and nervous looking. He gives a pitiful smile to all of us. "Welcome District… Three." He says as if he somehow he managed to forget the District he has been mentoring over the last few years. It would seem like he looks drunk but he just looks insane to me.

Ty watches as we all stare at him for a few moments before scratching his head and handing the microphone to the mayor quickly and sitting back down, seeming to be embarrassed.

"Hello citizens." The mayor booms sounding rather stiff and professional. He always was one to take things way too seriously. He clears his throat and stands straight as can be. He seems to think highly of himself, he must have come from a very rich family who nearly brainwashed him to think the way he does. District Three over the last few years hasn't always been its best with tributes. There was Katie from a few years back that was a complete psycho, which I knew from the beginning I might add, and then the look a-likes Micro and Zai. They were so smart it gave our District hope but in the end like so many of our tributes they perished.

The thought is depressing and it always does worse for my nerves. I can't even hide my anxiety. It shows on my face and I just know every single person around me sees it.

Once the mayor goes over the speech he gives a small nod to us all before handing Ty back the microphone. He almost drops it but catches it last second and gives a smile at that. The poor man, I just can't help but wonder what happened to him.

"Well let's start off with the ladies." Ty says and waits a moment before shuffling over to the bowl and quickly picking up a piece of paper but accidently taking two. He looks at them before realizing he has two and dropping one back into the bowl. He gives a nervous chuckle. I think this might be his last year as an Escort if he keeps this up. "Mae Juniper!" He says searching the crowd for her.

Almost immediately everyone gasps and eyes fall on a seventeen-year-old girl. Sadly I know her. I am not saying I hate her, after all hate is a useless emotion, but she wasn't one of those I was fondest of. I sure did find her interesting though.

Her face crunches up as she lets out a thick sob as a few hands pat her on the back. The girl was a genius and a very popular girl in my school. Only she was what many considered annoying. I respect people like my sister's outgoing natures but this girl took it a bit too far.

"Come on!" A peacekeeper booms grabbing her arms and Mae shakes him off angrily stomping to the stage giving an annoyed look. A bit of annoyance stirs inside me at her emotions, like she thinks she is too good to be reaped, but I just remind myself she basically has just been told she is going to die soon and I feel a bit more sorry for her.

She reaches the stage sitting hard in the chair crossing her arms like a child ready to burst out in a tantrum.

"Okay…" Ty says before shaking it off and walking over the other bowl. "Now the boys!" He picks out a slip managing to only pick out one this time. "Jean Adric!" My face bursts into a fearful mess. I don't cry or act like Mae, the first thing I do is turn around and burst towards the exit though I know escape is something I will never be able to get.

I actually manage to make it through the crowd of sixteen-year-old males and hear a shout and see Aislyn running towards me. In a panic I run for her and when I am reach her I bring her into a tight hug and let out a tearless sob before I feel the hands of a Peacekeeper yank me away from her. I already see my oldest sister coming forward, her plump belly slowing her down. When she does reach our sister she can only hold her back and even with that she looks so tired from rushing towards us. Like Mae I shake the Peacekeepers off accepting defeat.

I show my fear, but as I see my two shocked looking sisters watch me leave I feel something determined within me and spread across my face. And as I walk to the stage I just have to hope everyone in the Capitol can see through my fear to my determined nature inside. Because I might fear the future but that doesn't mean I plan on giving up.

* * *

District Two

Alexis Ryker, 18

I have gotten use to never feel at place, or confident. I understand that you can get use to anything if you have to deal with it long enough, but it stills feel so strange thinking those emotions are like a second instinct for me.

My parents have never seen me as anything but the fat and ugly girl that I am and always loved my younger brother Mason more. No matter how much I train or diet I can't change my body. Taller than most boys with wide shoulders, flat chest, and with lifeless brown hair. Those are things I simply can't change. I am anything but beautiful or someone to look twice at and the whole District knows that. Adding being poorer and my chances of friends is zero. My parents don't even bother to pretend like they don't love Mason ten more times than me.

As much as I just got use to it all like it didn't mean anything doesn't mean I enjoyed it. I simply tolerated it. My parents both have all their hope in Mason going on to Volunteer and bring honor to our family when I have worked so hard to be the one to become a Victor. I need the Victory so much. I am just a nothing.

I am so exhausted of be nothing.

Opening my eyes I listen to the soft pattering of rain on the roof. The rhythmical tone echoes through the house. The dark grey sky a reflection of my glum mood. Naturally being such a pitiful nothing as much as I am sure I am going to do whatever I have to get to the stage before all the other girls who will be fighting over Volunteering. Being a giant freak has its advantages. My legs are long enough to get me there quick and there isn't a chance I will go unnoticed. After all those are constantly noticing me sneaking glances and snickers in my direction all because I am such a sore thumb against this beautiful District filled with all these beautiful people I can never be like.

The thought of all those times makes me get up from my bed and look in the mirror at my reflection. I don't look as if I am going to be volunteering. Just an unflattering pink dress. I don't bother with anything else because with the rain it wouldn't do much. I don't need to look beautiful; I am use to being hideous anyway. From now on I worry about pulling off the tough and strong look. Not just a troll or that ugly tall girl.

No one would be able to deny my place if I win. No one would call me a troll ever again.

I manage a smile and the girl in the mirror has her lips just barely curled up at the corners. I can do this.

I am strong, fast, and trained. I can do this.

Walking towards the door I move down the hall and look inside my parent's room with the door wide open. My father stands near the window with something in his hands. I get my size from him. People call him the Bear down at the stone quarry. With my mother's height I never had a chance. Mason was the lucky one when it came to DNA.

He looks up seeing me glancing at him and ushers me forward. Confused I walk towards him to stand by him next to the window that shines in with gray and gloomy light.

My father was never cruel like my mother. He just worked for so long that he seemed to never be around. I can see now the carving in his hands is of a bear.

"Yes father?" I ask. He will be proud of me when I volunteer. I Just know it.

He takes my hand and drops the carving of the bear into my palm. I give a quizzical look not sure why he would bother to give me a gift when I have done nothing of importance to deserve it.

"Your token." He tells me looking as glum as the weather in the District.

I blink unsure how to respond. "Huh?" I ask.

"You are eighteen and have trained probably even more than Mason has." He says and gives me a look. I know what the look means. I did get his size after all. Maybe I just never bothered to think that he probably went through similar things. But he is a male and being large and wide shouldered isn't always such a bad thing. If anything it can be considered a good thing. Maybe my father isn't as bad as I once believed. "I never really got to know you. Please try to come home so I can." The words fill me with warmth the weather can't even squash and I nod determined. I will get to that stage and I will Volunteer. It has been so long since I have had kind words spoken to me, but things will be different soon enough.

I take the bear carving and put it in the pocket on my dress and leave the room and leave my father to himself to stare out the window. I know I need to start heading down to the Reaping. I usually go by myself.

My nerves everywhere and with my stomach full of butterflies I decide to go right by the kitchen skipping out on Breakfast. I want to not have to talk to my mother or Mason. I want the first time they see me today is when I triumphantly manage to Volunteer. District Two has been pushing its trainees harder than ever. The girl last year, Maria, got fairly far but Hazard died in the bloodbath. We haven't had one of our tributes die in the bloodbath in forever. We all just want a Victor. I need to win. I will be a hero.

"Leaving so early?" A nasty sounding voice crackles and I turn around realizing my wish to not run into my mother are not going to go as planned. I see my mother there, crossed arms staring at me with judging eyes as I stand in front of the door ready to leave.

I nod, "I want to get a good spot for my last Reaping I am eligible." I say. It is partially true, I do want to find myself a spot where I can get to the stage first but I don't want my mother to know I plan on volunteering. I want her to be surprised.

"By the time you probably find your way to the Town Center you will be considered late anyway. If you wanted to be early you should have camped there over night." My mother says rolling my eyes before turning around. Her cruel words go right through me. I got off lucky. She is distracted.

I turn back to the door and pull it open heading out into the rainy day. I don't mind the rain so I don't bring an umbrella, that will only slow me down. I do not care if my hair gets frizzy or my makeup ruined like most of the other girls who rush around the neighborhood. Besides my hair is already frizzy and I don't even bother with makeup. Even makeup won't help me.

* * *

"Welcome District Two to the 62nd Hunger Games Reaping!" The escort preaches and some cheering goes around. I move a bit anxiously in my spot in the front part in the Eighteen year old girl section. The stairs are so close. I see so many other girls near me just as intensely staring at the stairs. I don't care what it takes. I am getting to that Escort first.

"Well you all look so ecstatic I just know this year will be fabulous for District Two." The Escort says and a few cheer to that. They all want us to redeem ourselves. I can do that. I need to.

The girls are first, they always are.

I look across the crowd to where Mason stands looking at me smirking. He knows.

"Ladies first." The Escort says pleased to have such a non-hostile crowd. Let me get something straight, I am not psycho who loves to kill. I just need the respect you can get from coming out victorious. The idea of killing sends shivers down my spine but in the end I will do whatever it takes. I take a deep breath getting ready to move as the Escort pulls out a small slip of paper and begins to read out the name. She won't get far though.

"Tay-"

"I volunteer!" I boom as loud as possible along with a few other voices and I push a girl back and run up to the stage my blood pumping and my emotions as joyful as can be when I reach the Escort, I spot a pretty looking redhead disappointedly returning to the Eighteen year old section. She gives me death glares; I think she was supposed to volunteer. Oh well, I just can't give this opportunity up.

The Escort looks me up and down with mixed emotions. I can tell she knows as much as everyone else I am not much of a looker to attract Sponsors but with my size and build she seems to know I can beat up most males. She even seems a tad intimidated; yet still her fake pink eyes are so judging toward me. I can't stand it.

"What is your name dear?" She asks plastering on a smile and I see her glance towards the redhead. She probably wished that girl got here first. Skinny boned but the girl is pretty which I am not. It doesn't even matter though. I am finally here. This is amazing. Sure the butterflies still are strong within me but more than ever I can push them down and ignore them.

I take the microphone from her hands and look into the crowd at my mother with an appalled yet confused look on her face. I smile at her confusion. She is unsure if she should be proud of her troll of a daughter. She will see soon that she can be proud at me, that I am strong enough for her to love me.

"My name is Alexis Ryker, I am eighteen years old." I say before handing her back the microphone and looking at the mayor and mentors staring at me. This is all finally happening. I don't have to be nothing anymore; I can make myself into something.

I walk over to sit down in the seat for the tribute. I can do this, I need to.

* * *

District Ten

Corrie River, 18

The wind tugs at my hair as the strands that managed to escape from the fishtail pigtails at the mercy of the wind. The sun beats down on my skin as I take a deep breath and look onto the farm. I stand on the roof of the barn managing to feel at ease after so many times of being here, other than the barn there is the field for the animals to roam and the home for the humans of the farm. With all of the Roger's living in the place it has to be big. And it is.

The parents, the five kids, the kids of the older children and then the Roger's grandma who we all know is starting to loose it. "Why don't you stop staring and come in for breakfast?" The friendly voice makes a smile spread across my lips even on the day of the Reaping. I turn around to look at Cody coming up the ladder. His green eyes shined in the bright light of the District and his dark hair still looking as if he just woke up. From the fact he isn't even in his Reaping clothes yet I assume that the assumption he just got up is no far from the truth. He reaches the roof walking to stand next to me. He stands much taller than me, I am average height leaning on short but he even with that he is just simply tall in general.

"I'm not hungry." I say. Last Reaping while I am still eligible. I wish I could say then things would be calm and I wouldn't have to be constantly paranoid but that is something I will never get a chance at. I am a fugitive, and the worst part is that Cody doesn't even know. He is my best friend yet he just is told the story like everyone else. Amnesia. That is the story I have going. When I was lost and wondering through the woods and found the District I didn't honestly care which District it was I just needed a shelter. Even if that shelter ended up being the community home.

So when I heard people coming I pretended to be passed out cold and when I woke up I said I don't remember a thing. People didn't question me too much; here in District Ten we aren't exactly very defiant. We are just a bunch of farmers with the sun too hot to do much other than tend to our farms. So Peacekeepers just didn't question. The community home isn't fun but it kept me alive. Times have gotten better here in many ways though. Especially when one of those boys, from that day when I was found in the river, found interest in me. When he became my best friend and helped me, a girl running for her past and a depression that would always try to swallow her whole again. He didn't even know it. That boy was Cody and three years later I do work for the Roger's and Cody is beginning to make room for me to move in. Everything can be like a story tale.

The words pinch at my very core.

Cody lets out a sigh and looks at me. I am all ready to go to the Reaping and try to get this all over with. I just want one chip off my shoulder, eventually I will tell Cody the truth and yet another chip can be off my shoulder.

It is a nice change since before all of this the best option in my eyes just was to run away and now because of it a certain weight has been dropped onto me that will never go away, the worse part is I couldn't say a word about it.

"Okay but if you are hungry don't hesitate to come in. The family would enjoy seeing you." He says and I see he wants nothing more than to force me to go and eat breakfast with him but I also know he can see I need some time to think.

When I was young I grew up at the sea and with the spear I felt like it was an extension of my very limbs and I loved it. I loved to fish and help feed my family with it. Then one day because of that very skill I was accepted into the Training Center and trained but it never felt right with all those rich kids until I met my best friend. Our situations were so similar that I trained like no tomorrow, we both were good but I trained day and night and the head trainer told me I was destined to become a Victor. Maybe part of me wanted to be a Victor back then but a witch of a girl quickly squashed any hope. She bothered and pestered me into a deep depression and I broke. I ran away. I ran and ran until my legs were numb and felt like they were about to fall off. I ran until I came here.

I have no amnesia, while part of me wished I did. I cowardly escaped that witch and left my home back in District Four. I also left my best friend without a word; I left her to deal with the evil girl by the name of Monica. Last year I waited for her to volunteer. After all back before I left at fifteen when she wasn't tormenting me she was saying how proud her daddy was going to be when she volunteered at seventeen and won younger than eighteen. Not only does that not make much sense it made my friend hate her even more.

It wasn't Monica who volunteered last year. It was my dear friend Sedna I left behind. My outside was excited because she did what I originally planned on accomplishing before my depression took over. I wanted her to win so badly my heart ached each time she had a close run. She made it to the Final Showdown and came so close. I don't hate Rhett, I do not feel angry with Sedna for Volunteering. It just made my hate for the Games so much stronger.

I will never get closer with Monica or Sedna. That destroys me a bit but I left that place and left behind the crippling depression and all that anxiety and I just know I can't let it get back to me. Sedna would hate if that happened to me. So I need to carry on and I will.

Taking a deep breath of the clean air of Ten I go through my ritual. I imagine the sea and the sound of crashing waves and the smell of salt in fresh in the air. Then I open my eyes and start to head down the ladder and off the roof.

I just need to get through this one last reaping and maybe just maybe when I see Monica volunteer this year only to die I will be able to get a good night's sleep again. Just maybe.

* * *

I stand in the Town Center standing tall and straight trying to make myself look the 5'5 I am and not slouch into a 5'3 or 5'2, in the end Cody managed to get me to eat breakfast with his family. I was glad for it to. They are truly some of the most wonderful people. I can't exactly open up to them they way I can to Cody but if it weren't for them I would still be in that disastrous dress I was wearing from before. Instead I wear a blue-checkered dress from Cody's older sister and a daisy from her daughter.

I am not exactly one to give much care for looks, not many do here in Ten where we often find more important things, but I am not above saying that it wasn't nice to have people trying to make me look pretty. It isn't that I am ugly but I am not gorgeous either. I am rather plain and simple. I like it that way.

The Escort, Natta, steps onto the stage with a smile. Everyone said since after two years in a row where our tributes have done well she has been so excited and some rumors even said she refused to move to another District saying she has a good feeling about Ten. The woman is a nut.

I have to say it wasn't a good year to watch for me last year. There was Sedna, my old best friend, and then Cassie who was another girl in a similar situation of being stuck in the Community Home.

Though as much as it is difficult for me to get over their deaths, even though I barely knew Cassie, I know from so long of being in this situation that the past is the past and dwelling on ghosts won't do much good. If I can accept it all then just maybe those ghosts of the tragedy I have experienced won't be able to catch up, I can just hope though but believing it is possible is the first step.

"Is everyone ready to find out who our new tributes will be?" Natta asks and the District goes dead quiet almost a silent way to be defiant. Natta gives a smile that just reeks of keeping-things-under-control and lets out a laugh before giving the microphone to the mayor to do the same old speech about why we all stand here as if we don't know already.

The mayor is getting older and at a few parts he stumbles on words or pronounces something wrong but he manages to get through it and Natta grabs the microphone as soon as he does to go on with her little show.

"Females first as always!" She says and walks to the bowl and I stay calm as can be. My eyes closed I tell myself I didn't even take out as much tesserae as some people did.

Her new five inch long nails (fake obviously) stumble to grasp onto a slip and she gives a nervous laugh as she struggles to open the slip of paper with her nails. She gives a smile to the camera before reading out the name.

"Corrie Rivers."

I can hear the thumping of my heartbeat but everything else just transforms into a high-pitch noise I can't understand. It looks like escaping my ghost just won't be so easy.

"Corrie Rivers are you there?" Natta asks searching the crowd until my fellow citizens give me up and move away from me like I am ridded with some disease they might catch.

Shit, this is it. This is the moment I feared every since I was fifteen and found my way hear.

My past just seems to refuse to let go of me.

* * *

District Seven

Lily Excavase, 16

_Her tired and exhausted looking face manages to give a last smile before whispering the words to the boy standing over her looking as sad as every other person sitting in the room. _

_ As if something bursts from inside me I can barely stop myself I wrench myself from my seat unable to look at a single second more as my best friend dies all because of some stupid fire. I rush to the door just managing to catch a glimpse at my family looking at me shocked. My father looks the calmest as if he understands that I need to let out some air and knows I won't do anything too foolish. My brother, my twin, just stares at me teary eyed as I open the door and throw myself outside the bird's sweet songs not at all pleasing at this moment. Everything makes me angry._

_ I don't know where to go; I realize that as soon as I escape out here. What now? I want to cry and bawl till there is no more in me but it won't relieve the anger inside me. I curse the Capitol. I curse the Games. I curse the fact it has to be so damn sunny today. _

_ I walk past a few houses and don't allow myself to wonder what June's family must feel at this moment. I don't even bother to wonder if my family will chase after me. I don't plan on doing something stupid though, I just need some sort of release. A few people stare at me out their windows a share pitiful looks for me to the person standing next to them. They all know. _

_ And I hate that almost as much as the fact she is dead._

_ Once I past the houses to the edges of the woods I find a large thick tree and let out a long shriek as I send my fist into the bark my fist burning almost instantly as tears begin pouring out. I let out a sob nearly choking as all the tears try to force themselves out, the tight feeling in my throat from holding back the tears being released. I repeat the process over and over until I figure if a Peacekeeper came they would have full right to ship me away to a mental asylum or just kill me. I punch the bark until my fist begins to bleed and I fall to the ground. _

_ My best friend is gone._

_ "It hurts doesn't it?" A voice calls to me and I immediately start to wipe away all signs of tears though it will be no use, that is until I realize the voice is of my own twin brother's Mason._

_ I turn around my cheeks red like tomatoes as I cry like a toddler. Mason's face is red and a single tear manages to escape from his eye. His fist clenched tightly and he quivers slightly, all signs that he seems to want to do exactly what I have been doing._

_ "Yeah it does."_

The painful memory haunts me over and over, the part where I watch June die repeats more often then the rest. I guess my head wasn't exactly screwed on tight enough that day, I never really thought that Mason loved June just as much as I did. Only he loved her in many ways in a way I never could. They dated for only a while but I was no fool and knew my twin still had lingering feelings that only became more painful for him after her death in the 61st Hunger Games.

I cock my head slightly to the side as I stare at my reflection. My strawberry blonde hair cut short in a pixie hair cut and my brown eyes looking over my skinny and short body. June's death hit me hard and didn't just result in broken and bloody knuckles.

You never really know exactly who you are to people unless you are forced to. When I started growing quieter and less outspoken I realized just how much myself had been stolen away. Between Mason and me I was always outgoing and always talked and stood up for myself. When I became the girl that just stared at her paintings day by day and barely ate I still was too thick headed to see just how bad thing had gotten. But eventually when I looked at my reflection and could see my ribs I realized I had to get things together. Depression hit me hard and all the time when I was recovering I just looked at Mason and couldn't help but wonder.

How could he be so much better at this?

I had become a mess and he was simply grieving, I don't say that to insult how much he cared for her it just made me feel weak. Maybe in many ways that was an awakening to remind myself that while I will never be the stronger of us two I will always have him to be strong for me.

It gave me strength.

And here today I stand in simple green dress. I was never one for dresses or many things girly. After all in Seven our culture is raised in the woods and the men become lumberjacks and the families just naturally are strong willed. In many ways that is what I loved about Seven. We have hard working attitudes that places like District One are lucky enough to develop in their youth.

"Come on Lily we have to go!" I hear Mason call and I stand for a moment and notice that the purple stains from the berry I squished to use for paint a day ago still hasn't quite washed away.

I close my eyes for a moment before starting to move out of my room and into the hall where Mason stands in his reaping clothes ready to go. We would be identical if it weren't for the differences in genders. We both are on the shorter side, except of course he wouldn't be 5'2 and he does have about five inches on me at least, and have strawberry blonde hair and brown eyes.

Giving him a half-hearted smile he returns it and he wraps his arm protectively around my shoulder as we both walk into the kitchen where our mother and father wait for us. Usually we would go with June but…

I don't even allow myself to finish the thought. I need to stay strong. I just wish I didn't have to do so in some stupid dress.

"Ready to go?" My father says comfortingly. He is strong looking from many hours chopping away at trees but he is a gentle shark.

We both nod. So with that we walk as a family out of our modest home and into the street where families all head together in the same direction to the Town Center where the Peacekeepers are already probably all set up for the Reaping.

Parts of my sadness are replaced with rage at the thought but I manage to make it through without running off our screaming. By the time we reach the Town Center I know we are nearly late.

Giving our parents hugs goodbye we are forced to separate as both Mason and I rush to get in line so we can get checked in. That will be when we part. One of the disadvantages of having a twin of the opposite gender.

The escort Moon steps onto the stage just as I check in. In a moment of rush I forget to say goodbye to my brother and just head straight to the section for sixteen-year-old girls. It will be fine though, my family isn't the richest and we do have our names in their some extra times. Still we are usually well feed and our names aren't nearly in there as many as the other more poor residents. Then again June's family was in the same situation and she still managed to get reaped.

At that moment my heart starts pumping quicker and louder as I curse myself for finally finding something that could panic me.

_Please just make these Reapings quick! _I think bitterly to myself as the mayor goes over some speech looking proud like it is the most beautiful written thing in all of History. Man I really hate that guy. Finally after the boring speech comes to an end and the mayor applauds himself Moon is back in control of the microphone.

"Hello ladies and gentlemen!" She says. "Before I pick our female let me just say, _may the odds be ever in your favor!" _She says giving a wink to us all that almost makes me want to gag. Such an overused and cheesy line for Escorts to use. After that cliché display I watch anxiously as she goes over to the Reaping bowl and pushes her hand deep into the sea of papers inside the glass ball. Picking one that has to have been on the very bottom she manages to snatch it up and clears her throat before reading the name on the slip of paper.

"Lily Excavase."

All eyes are on me as people begin to whisper about how "unfortunate" it is for June's little friend to be Reaped. My heart beats faster pushing blood through my veins spreading the rage I feel.

I want to scream, I want to punch a tree like I did when my friend died a year ago. I can't scream though, the Peacekeepers already see me and soon enough if I don't get a move on they will be dragging me to the stage. Glaring I start marching forward a mixture for anger and desperation swirling inside me filling me with hysteria.

This can't be happening.

I manage to get on the stage and seat down without breaking down in anyway. I just sit there trying to keep myself from falling apart.

"Lovely!" Moon says looking me over. I guess maybe she likes the rage in my eyes but other than that she seems rather nervous over all and confused. I am small enough for her to be disappointed though, that is for sure. "Onto our male tribute!" She squeaks before making her way to the next bowl this time picking the very first slip.

"Mason Excavase."

All my rage falls apart; in fact every little part of me falls apart.

Wide eyes I watch my brother panicked and wishing I could be there to comfort him but I am stuck on this stage.

I am going into the Hunger Games with my brother.

Suddenly he catches my eyes and we share a hysterical moment before I see him tumble to the ground.

* * *

District Six

Elian Coen, 14

For once I use this device, which for so long I have used as a tool to stare into the skies and beyond this cursed placed, to see within the realms of the District. Moving it I adjust it to get a better look at the Town Center. A smile creeps onto my lips, it makes me feel more comfortable knowing I can just look out this telescope and see what is going on there at any time. I can see if people are beginning to gather or if there still isn't a soul other than Peacekeepers there.

Pushing my chair away from the telescope I get up reminding myself I promised my mother I would be fine getting myself ready and I am not willing to let her down on that. I guess I just see it as some magical situation where this is my mother's first time letting myself do things independent and while she hates to see her sweet baby boy grow up she knows it is necessary. In reality my mother just has better things to do and she wouldn't actually help me she just said it because she felt it to be mandatory.

Going through my closet until I find the white bag with the words, "Reaping clothes." Printed on it I remove it from the array of clothing and unzip it to reveal the white buttoned down shirt and expensive looking pants my father had the maid lay on my bed for me. At the time I was worried she might have moved one of my things but then that worry translated into worry about the Reaping.

But it isn't like I have any tesserae. I will never have to get tesserae. Being rich does have its advantages. Still I can't help but allow it to get to me. I never liked being outside anyway. I don't go to school. I have no friends. My parents give me everything I could possible desire but caring love. So growing up I made those things on my own. I began to read and soon I read more and more until my room was filled with stack after stack of books on space and science. Then I got a telescope, something that definitely made me appreciate my family's wealth, and with that the stars and planets beyond this Earth became my friends.

All I was missing was caring love. Eventually I moved past that though. Now I spend hour upon hour studying the sky and reading books I only can get because of my father's wealth. I watch and record the sky activities to nearly dawn arrives. Because of it I rarely get any sleep. Dark circles are evident under my eyes and I almost look sickly.

My parents could care less though. If they start to think I am looking thin or sick they just send me a package of food. One time my mother even gave me some lotion to put under my eyes to help the dark circles to go away. Naturally I threw the stuff away immediately. What they don't understand is in many ways I sort of like being that way. It doesn't bother me and no one is around to get an input in it anyway.

Dressed, I walk back into my room. It is a complete mess. The room is dark except for the little amount of light that manages to seep through the curtains. I love it. Stacks of books scatter all around my bed and drawings and records of the night sky hang all over the walls. Overall it looks like it belongs to someone insane but I am anything but.

Looking out the telescope once more I begin to see people arriving and a small line already forming to get checked in. My parents won't be attending them; I think they might just get a good spot on the balcony where they can oversee it without having to be near all the "normal" people.

Sighing I shake my head and head out the door. I always feel a bit frightened going to the Reaping. There isn't a good thing about it. Not only do I risk being taken into the Games but I was never one to enjoy being around others. Actually I hate it. I much rather be in my room reading books.

The few maids and workers that aren't at the Reaping for their children, or if they are even eligible still, all wish me good fortune and tell my comforting words. Their words have little affect on me and pass through me, but the thought is sweet of them even if they likely don't say it because they are actually fond of me.

I find my way onto the street and wonder in the direction of the Town Center, I get lost a few times but overall I manage to find my way just fine on my own. Doesn't mean I still wouldn't have liked my actual parents to come with me. They are just too 'busy'.

By the time I do manage to find my way the crowd I saw the beginning formation of back at the house has turned into a decent crowd that must be already at least one-third of the District Six population.

Still the line manages to be long enough that I dreadfully shuffle over to it. I feel a body shove past me and look to her as she looks back at me and her gray/blue eyes catch mine before she gives me an apologetic look before rushing off. I shake it off not wanting to loose my spot in line.

After a while of waiting in the line a nervous looking twelve year old squeaks as her finger is yanked up and pricked. Some people give her pitiful looks as she moves away rubbing her finger. Next in line I watch her before I hear the man checking kids in clear his throat annoyed and turn around to see him glare at me before he sees my face and his glare disappears. He must recognize me, he knows how important my parents are.

I can't help but feel embarrassed as he gently picks up my hand and pricks it giving me a small nod and then points in the direction of the fourteen year old boy area. I walk away before he can do anything else and just rub my finger on my pants.

The escort by the name Thunder waltz onto the stage looking at us all like dirt under her feet. She clears her throat before holding her hand in the air. "Welcome to the Reaping for the 62nd Annual Hunger Games." She says.

The mayor takes over to give the speech. He looks honestly bored at it all as he tries to get through the speech. We all know it and it seems even he, the mayor, is bored of it.

Thunder sits proudly perched on the chair not getting up until the mayor hands it to her. When she gets control of it she flashes her pearly whites. "Lets start with the females." She says loving the attention of all of us looking to her. She goes to the bowl and just takes the first name her fingers touch and yanks it out taking a moment before reading the name.

"Cara Meridius." She says and everyone looks to a girl in the eighteen year old section. It is the girl from before, the one who bumped into me. She squirms a bit under the pressure of a thousand eyes staring at her before she puts on a poker face walking to the stage. She moves stiffly. She is older though and is fit enough; maybe she could even go far. We had a good year last year with Curtis who got all the way to the Final Showdown. Which is pretty impressive for our District that rarely gets to the Final Eight.

"Onto the males!" Thunder announces as the Cara girls sits straight up in her chair. She repeats the process she did for the female and reads the name out for everyone to hear. "Elian Coen!"

No, no…

My limbs feel numb as I start to move through the crowd everyone staring at me, they don't look too happy to see me reaped. I don't make a sound or any facial expression and just walk to the stage and stare at Cara. She recognizes me. Thunder stands in between us. "Shake hands!" She tells us and Cara gets up holding out her hand. For a moment I just stare at it paralyzed.

Finally I take her hand shaking it before sitting back down so filled with fear that I can't even get a complete thought through my head.

How could this happen?

* * *

Hey guys I am sorry this chapter was a bit late I just had to get things under control and really wanted to take time to look of grammar and all more. I know there are probably still mistakes (I am trying to improve I really am) I just couldn't manage to get it out last night and I think posting it now it acceptable since I was going to wake up early today but I actually woke up late and was nearly late for school ^-^ Then I had to finish it up and I get home from school late (about 4:20)

Also you might notice the style is different, I want to try something new and instead of doing all the Reapings I am going to do five chapter with five povs each that would be the length of what they would have in a reaping and then have that to give all the characters an introduction. Then after that parts might be about 1,000 to 1,500 words instead of around 2,000 each. I am sorry if that is confusing it is just something new.

CH. For introducing tributes:

Reapings part 1

Reapings part 2

Goodbyes (Will only be four povs)

Train Rides part 1

Traid Rides part 2'


	3. Chapter 3 The Chosen: Reapings Part Two

_**The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. -Mark Twain**_

* * *

_A/N- I realize the grammar isn't best, but I decided to just put up the grammar after one run through of checking the grammar so you guys can see it. But I will be going back over it and editing it more for better grammar._

* * *

The Chosen: Reapings Part Two

District One

Ecstasy Rapture, 16

Biting my lip I stare into the mirror at my reflection. A deep sigh before I lean forward, makeup brush in hand as I finish some final touches to my eyeshadow on the right eye. Taking a look at it to compare it to the left eye I see a few mistakes here and there but I am beyond caring. I just let out a sigh and put in an extra pushpin into my bun before moving away from the mirror. I don't want to have to take another look at my frail and thin body. I have been loosing so much weight lately that my black dress I got just for this occasion is already big on me.

_I take a few moments to gather myself, a smile across my face, this is in my blood. This is all so easy. I have trained day and night so I could be standing here in front of all these people so they can see just how hard I have worked. I release my grasp onto the knife and let it soar through the air and strike right into the target ten feet away. Bullseye at just seven. I am filled with joy as I resist the emotion to jump up and down. My father was right; maybe this place really could help me._

Those emotions I felt so many years ago somehow manage to escape from me. The thought is painful and I just try to push it away and make it turn into anger that I will need soon to keep going on.

Listening to the soft pattering of my feet in these fancy shows I head down the hall to where I see my father on the couch crossed arm staring at a the TV screen. He won't be going to the Reaping. He should be, since he is a Victor and that is what they are supposed to do, but he hasn't been to a Reaping in so long. He hasn't been out of the house much in such a long time in general.

Maybe that is why it is so easy for me to go behind his back for so many things. I wonder if he knew if he would care, if he would try to help me or stop me. Then again it doesn't take a genius to see how much of a hot mess I look like. My pale skin and lip, narrow frame. It all is just the signs that allow people to take one look at me and immediately just assume things on me. Even though most of the time the things they assume of very true.

"I am heading out now." I tell my father loud enough to bring him out of his trance to hear me. It works. He looks my way and blinks a few times.

"Huh?" He asks.

"I am going to the Reaping." I tell him, he looks very sad at this but not too much. After all the only way to pretty much go into the Games in this District is just to Volunteer. There are always people fighting over being a tribute anyway.

His calm look changes as he looks me over. For a moment I fear he sees the true me, the drugged up shell of a body left of his daughter. Then I remember he must question how dressed up I am. Usually I don't try this hard, but I plan on Volunteering and I guess I just wanted to look nice. He knows it too.

"You aren't planning on volunteering aren't you?" He asks with more emotion than I have seen him with in such a long time, maybe he really does care. The thought leaves me quickly. I am silent. "You can't volunteer, you know what the consequences are." He says.

I know it very well. My mother died in them and my father was broken by them. I know. I just don't care. You can't break what is already broken and someone who no longer fears death, cannot be intimidated by facing it. I have no risk. I am doing this to find something in life. So many in my District think so highly of these stupid Games I just want to understand why they do so much. Worse comes worse I either die or come back the same.

_I stand in the doorway of the room nervously. This is the moment. I have impressed them and they gave me this chance to train. Three hours of private training is something so many people would kill for. The women who will be training me stands with her back to me. Her name is Winter. She won a little while ago. _

_ "Hello ma'am." I announce myself to her and she spins around to look at me surprised by my young sounding voice. I hope I impress her by the fact I am just seven and already am going to such extent to prepare myself._

_ "Look who the rat dragged in."_

_ "Excuse me?" I ask my anxiety jut gets stronger. My cheeks feel warm with embarrassment._

_ "So you are going to be the little brat I am going to train?" Winter spits at me. I stumble over words unsure if this is some sort of test of something. Surely she can't be this mean to me right? "Ugh if I am going to have to do this you need to stop talking like a retard." She spits at me._

_ I nod. this must be a test. It has to be. She can't be this cruel, she can't._

I was so wrong.

"Ecstasy?" My father asks me pulling me from my own memory. My first memory of that cursed woman.

"I have to go, I don't want to be late." I say suddenly no longer wanting to be here. I don't want him to convince me out of this when he has never seemed to care what happens to me before.

He opens his mouth to say something but I am already out the door into the cold day. He can't do this to me; he never cared before he can't just decide to now. This decision is right. I know that more than anything at this moment.

I see a few families from the Victor's village heading cheerfully toward the Reaping. I imagine the situation in other District must be a whole other story.

I hear some loud shouting and laughing and turn to look at District One's most recent Victor, Patrick. He and his friends seem to be attempting to cheer themselves up. They always were a bit unique. I look to Patrick in the middle of the group; he will be my mentor soon. He had his nineteenth birthday not too long ago. He turns seeing me and as soon as he does I look away and continue walking to the Town Center.

When I reach the Town Center I already see girls pushing themselves to the front. I need to Volunteer first, but how? I watch the girl who clearly wants to Volunteer as I wait in line to check in. By the time I reach it the woman grabs my arm harshly and pricks it, I still haven't gathered a good plan. Part of me itches saying maybe if I took something to boost my energy… no from now on I am clean. Maybe this could be the very thing to help my addiction.

That is a nice thought.

Taking a deep breath and push through the crowd and for the last time I wobble about uneasily on my feet. Most people in the District know of my issues with drugs, so if I pretend to be on them they won't seem to mind if I act like I was so…

It is an awful thing to do but it will be necessary. Mumbling I stumble to the front of the line pushing in front of a girl who is about to yell but sees me and just rolls her eyes. She won't see me coming when I suddenly snap up into action.

Tammy steps to the stage smiling at all of us. "Hello everyone!" She says. I don't lesson as she says some other things that send cheers through the crowds. I don't pay attention. I focus.

The mayor takes over giving a speech, which he seems to have shortened because it goes rather quickly. Or maybe through all the things that have wearied away any emotion I could possibly feel somehow I have managed to feel something through the numbness. Maybe.

I guess many would wonder how I manage to become so messed up. Well Winter wasn't just rude, she was a broken Victor and she wanted to break me too. She succeeded. They found out about her tormenting me after a few years but it didn't change things. I had nothing; training never brought me the joy it once did because of that tortured woman. She didn't just torture me, she took away the one thing I love and made me hate it.

When I was nine I started doing drugs, I was ashamed and knew they weren't good but I couldn't help myself. I was weak. Things got worse and now I find myself here, addicted.

Tammy takes over once more and picks a name from the female's bowl right away. "Time to pick our tributes!" She says as if the Reaping actually means anything, as if as soon as she says that names that someone won't volunteer in such person's place. So many of the girls next to me tense up and I keep up the act.

She unfolds the piece of paper and I swear that some of us hold our breaths.

"Gigi Fairs!" She calls and the battle is on. I snap up pushing back the girls next to me and they stumble back looking too shocked and appalled by the fact I wasn't so out of it after all. I run as fast as I can and make it to the stage before I even realize I am there.

Out of breath, mostly from the adrenaline rush, I lean over to speak into the microphone. "Ecstasy Rapture, sixteen." I say before moving away to seat in the seat for the tributes before Tammy can even say a word. I look over to the past Victors, where my father should be but is "sick", and see Patrick glance at me. He knows who I am. Not by name but by my face. After all we are neighbors.

Sitting back I wait for some other boy to Volunteer. I admit a small surge of energy bursts through my lifeless body when I realize I need to pay attention since whoever this boy is he will be my competition.

"Onto the boys!" Tammy says with a big smile.

"Star Means!" She says quickly her eyes dashing around to see who runs up to volunteer like this makes her day. Then again it probably does. A boy with short black hair and shadowy grey eyes steps out from the crowd reaching the stage quickly and managing to get there before another boy in the sixteen year old section. He looks bored and a bit dull, but he must be volunteering for some reason. Unless he has a similar wish to me. He has a long scar running up his arm.

"I volunteer," he says before adding. "Burgundy Platt." He goes to sit down and his eyes meet mine and he keeps them there not caring about if it is strange or anything. So I do the same back.

In many ways I believe he must be on similar terms as I am. Except not a drug addict since if he was I would recognize him. No it isn't that, I am not sure what it is but I know I want to find out.

* * *

District Eight

Enya Mathioas, 15

The slums of District Eight always had a very distinct feel. Working in the factories they didn't get you as just a person, they get you as a family. So every working day I work with those of my family old enough and hope the ones still doing longer hours at school will be okay. Then when we get off after the shorten time for minors we go to school for such a short time that doesn't even compared to all those clean faces of those who are fortunate to not have to work. It is stressful, but it has to be done.

Unfortunately for the last few things that is just how it has have to been. As much as I hate slaving away at the factory it is much better than starving. My family was never too fortunate. We have been hit with tragedy and obstacles often enough it just makes me want to scream. I am the oldest though; I have to keep it together. I have to pretend like I am not beginning to realize why my mother left after her latest baby. The one who isn't even around anymore.

Just because I can see why she left doesn't mean I agree with her. I remind myself that sometimes I need to think of myself and all of that, I don't constantly worry and act like some Saint with my siblings, but I do love them. Even if one is creepy as hell and I sometimes find myself locking my door. You don't pick you family, that is just decided for you. You just have to deal with whatever you are given. Fair or not. I didn't have a clue what to do with my family, I just kept on moving along. Living from Eight it wasn't too hard to make my own clothing for my family.

Still as much as I try I still worry. I have come to hate my mother for ditching. She left at her fifth child and now because of it she isn't even around anymore. She was just two when Edmund got into one of his fits of rage. He always had them. My mother use to know how to handle him when she still cared. I can handle it pretty well too. But Semira and I, the next oldest at thirteen, were working at the time. Only the baby, Eris (who is now five), and Edmund were home. Edmund got out of control and beat the baby to death. There isn't a day I don't think about it. I didn't know what to do when I got home, what was I supposed to? Edmund was always a bit creepy and had real issues with rage. So I did nothing, the baby was gone and I just kept moving. But after that I never left Edmund home alone with Eris without Semira there, who has always been great with taking over when I can't.

Maybe I should have done something differently. I should have turned him in or something, but he is my brother and he was so young at the time. I was so shocked and still getting use to the whole in charge thing.

Taking a deep breath I remind myself to not think too much about it, maybe I can review some life decisions another day but right now I don't need more bleak thoughts. I already have enough for one day. Today is the Reaping and natural I have a fairly good amount of tesserae. So does Semira, which I hate but she doesn't have too much. We have no choice but to get the extra supplies anyway. Semira is thirteen though; she still has it better than how I do currently at fifteen.

Even more bleak thoughts. Fabulous. I get up from my seat and walk through the house and up the stairs to my room. Semira and Eris share the room next to mine and Edmund has the one below us. Naturally in the slums of District Eight all the houses are sort of squashed together but tower above the ground. Our house was three rooms that are all on different levels, but that doesn't mean the house is luxurious. On Edmund's floor is our only bathroom and on the ground floor is just the kitchen and table area.

I pick up the white dress on my bed, it is slightly yellowed from age but overall it is still in good shape. I change into it quickly and silently before running a brush through my light colored auburn hair. I haven't cut it in so long it reaches almost to my belly button by now. Now taking much time to dwell on my attire I slip back out the door to see Eris emerging from her room. I smile at her and wrap my arms around her; she makes the rest of us happy. I don't know how she manages to be so optimistic. Through all of my life I have always felt so distant from everyone else, it was just easier that way I guess.

"Ready?" I ask and she nods. "Have you seen Edmund or Semira?"

"They said they would wait outside on the stairs for us." She replies.

"Okay great lets head out." I say and she grabs my arm as we both head down the flight of stairs. They creak a bit but they have always done good, never broken on us yet. When we reach the kitchen area I pick up the last bit of bread I got for today and hand it to Eris. She takes a big bite before taking nibbles of it as we walk to the front door. I get on the ground and look her right in her eyes. Dark green with flecks of blue just like my own, except she doesn't have bangs.

"Finish it before we go outside." I say glancing towards the bread and she listens shoving the last piece into her mouth looking like a little chipmunk. I smile a it, though the act is serious. I don't want Edmund to get jealous. That wouldn't be good especially since he is in charge of her for the next thirty minutes till the end of the Reaping. I love my brother but sometimes I fear what could happen if during those moments he had one of his episodes of rage. It wouldn't be good.

Once she finishes chewing I open the door to see Edmund and Semira discussing something on the front steps. In the background I can see all the other factory families leaving their homes to get started for the Reaping. We aren't the only ones left without parents. Or at least some of them must just have parents who can't go to the Reaping. We have the day of for the Reaping, but adults that were still under middle-aged who could work the best would only have the morning off.

"We all good?" I ask and Semira nods along with Edmund but I can see he has something to say.

"Naturally sis." Edmund says a beginning to walk in the direction of the Town Center. I sigh before leading Eris along with Edmund with Semira at my side.

"You worried?" Semira asks me.

I shrug, "Not more than last year."

She nods; I can tell she is stressed out. I can only wonder what her and Edmund were discussing; "Your name is in there more, so is mine."

"Don't worry you are just thirteen." I say.

"I am not worried about myself as much." She says.

"Whatever happens we will just have to deal like we always have." I tell her and she looks a bit more at comfort.

That fills with a bit of a sunny thought. She needs to be calm, I can be as surly and sullen as I please but she doesn't need to.

We walk in silence; the four of us all get a few looks but not many. We are a family and while we manage to keep it together most of these people now our parents have left us and that our youngest passed away from a "sickness".

By the time we reach the Town Center I can already see the Square fairly filled and an instant feeling of frustration fills me. I look around until I spot a nice little spot in the crowd near the rope that separates spectators from those actually eligible to be reaped. I can keep an eye on Edmund and Eris if they stand there. I take Edmund's hand and point towards it.

"Take Eris over there, please." I ask giving him a smile that is hard to force onto my smile. It is hard to act joyful on such a day as today.

"Whatever you say sis." Edmund says and takes Eris' hand and leads her in the direction of the spot. He got into his fit of rage because he couldn't deal with the baby's constant crying and over time he broke. I know he likes Eris much more so I don't fear he will have any anger issues right now.

Once they are swallowed by the crowd, Semira and I make our way to the line to check in. There is only one person in front of us since we are a bit late. I can already see all the Victors on stage. There is the Evers' family. Which includes Tom Evers and Rhett Evers, the latest Victor. Which luckily meant more food for our District. Which I was so very thankful for because since then we have managed to gain some necessary weight. Things are a bit nicer now here. Still just dull Eight in the end though.

The escort who has come back to us with a Victor after her first year of escorting for us smiles as eerie and creepy as ever. She gives me shivers just looking at her. She looks so different it is hard to even process she is human.

"Are we going to pick another Victor this year Eight?" She says and I see our latest Victor shiver a bit at that. She is just seventeen. Two years older than me.

After the long and boring course of the Reaping before selecting the tribute goes by in almost a flash of the eye I stand very still and try to nearly sink in with the crowd. I feel a girl bump into me and I turn to her and she says a sorry and I just stumble over some words before just turning back to look at the stage. I have about zero skill with strangers. I get so fidgety.

The escort walks to a bowl and everyone glances at each other. She is picking the male first? She doesn't seem to acknowledge it but the bowl she goes to is for the males.

She selects a slip of golden-rimmed paper and reads out the name. "Than Jerralds!" She shouts and looks to the females but instead a male comes from the crowd. "Opps that was the males wasn't it?" The escort asks looking stressed. She pushes a piece of her strange looking hair behind her ear.

I am focused on Than though. Sleek black hair, pale skin, and green eyes. He is fairly tall and muscular but his lips from a frown and his eyes morose. Not really in accordance to being reaped though. More like that is just how he is. He actually doesn't seem too affected by being reaped. Suddenly a whisper I hear reminds why he looks so familiar.

In the slums there were many tales, almost like ghost stories, that were whispered from child to child in school or while working. One shocking one I barely could believe and tired so hard to keep Eris and Edmund from hearing was a tale about the Community Home. The place full of orphans was never too pleasant but so long ago things took a turn for worse. Children were murdered. Often. I became something where people would just wait to find out which orphan didn't come to school. I never really believed it at the time, but I did wonder why so many of my peers were gone. Was there a sickness spreading? I didn't know I just knew eventually there was only six left. Some kids said that one of them killed the rest and they found out and that one was killed till there were just five survivors. At that time I thought maybe the Peacekeepers just wanted to keep us in line while not wanting to have to worry about the Community Home children. Whatever happened, murder or something more average, there were five left.

Than was one of those five. I wouldn't remember his name but his face is familiar. He was one of the last five.

I shiver at the thought but push it all away as he walks to the stage. Now it is the females.

"Okay well now it should be the females." The escort says as she stares at Than. Than glances towards his mentors. Well mentor. Rhett's father had a heart attack and couldn't mentor anymore. The other Victors are either females or bedridden. "Enya Mathioas."

What?

I am shocked, what will happen now? I have been reaped. I need to get on that stage when I so badly want to sink to the ground. As I attempt to make my way to my stage I get a look at Eris and Edmund.

What are they going to do?

What am I going to do?

Somehow I don't know if it will be so easy to just keep on moving in this case.

* * *

District Five

Aeron Than, 17

The silence in the room is undisturbed, beautiful. This is the day, the day of my annual viewing. Everything feels so different this time around though. It forces a smile to creep on my face. I just can't help it, this time it is special.

It is late into the night and my parents and brother are all asleep, they must know I am spending my night here doing my little viewing I do every eve of the Reaping. They don't want to bother me. In their hearts they can see that little things are off about me, that my daydreams that always capture me and leave me distant to other are less than average. Maybe they refuse to think someone in their family is like that or maybe they just fear me. I like to believe both. It is a nice feeling to be feared, not too much to try to get rid of me, just enough for them to stay quiet about me.

See I know they are aware that I record all the Hunger Games and get so swept up with it that I re-watch all my favorite battles and death. They must just ignore that fact or try to lie to themselves that I am just trying to protect myself if I am forced into such a situation. The truth is I just love the Games in general. There is something so simple yet so beautiful up-taking with it. I love it. I can't imagine not, while I understand so many can't imagine enjoying them I must say they are missing out on so much. It isn't like they are going away so might as well enjoy it.

So each year the night before the Games I find myself sitting here in the pitch black re-watching the latest Games. I have finally gotten to the Final Showdown where Rhett stands in the room of dead bodies surrounding her. Such a stunning set up, what it must be like to stand around all those fallen bodies. I take a deep breath refreshed at the thought.

Maybe it is my escalated joy in watching the Games that has pushed me into such an idea of volunteering. It isn't that often here in District Five, usually our tributes don't even go too far, I mean last year our tributes didn't get past the first night. Though I must say they had such intriguing deaths. Leon torn apart by those mutts and Theresa a bloodbath.

Taking a large gulp of water I sink further into my chair as I continue watching the bright screen that provides the only light in the room. The room is nice enough, the TV is nice enough and the couch is new enough. My family isn't filthy rich but we aren't poor. We will be soon if I manage to win the Games.

I would sure love to, or at least go out in a fabulous way.

It continues after she is swooped up from the Arena.

I let out a sigh, the Victor Interview. Not my favorite and I always get bored; there is no suspense other than seeing how the Victor turned out. I watch it anyway interested to see how different the girl was. Other than that part I was bored but I watched anyway, just like I always do. This is my favorite pastime. And soon I will be apart of it. I could really get use to that thought.

* * *

By the time my younger brother and I reach the front of the line to get your blood taken I can barely stand still with my impatience bursting. It soon disappears as soon as I realize I need to gather myself for this. I don't want to act like one of those idiots I cheer their bloody deaths for.

Having my finger pricked I don't even take a moment to take interest in the small bead of blood that emerges from the slightest cut, I just leave my brother be and head over the seventeen year old section and make my way to the front. I don't worry about having to compete to volunteer; I just always have loved a front seat view. Well I am standing, but still.

The escort steps onto the stage, a rather annoying woman. I love the Games not the Capitol. I could care less about the Capitol. I am just glad they enforce the Hunger Games.

She take a shallow breath preparing herself as if she is a performer and she is on stage with a crowd of thousands of admirers and well-wishers and not people who most likely despise her. Got to give her credit for her confidence. She dances over to the mayor like a ballet star, the mayor is speechless but just takes the microphone and begins the speech I have come to memorize. I watch Reapings nearly ten times each before the Games so I can start predicting outcomes. Usually I predict quite well, over the years I have become an excellent predictor.

"So that is why we are gathered here." The mayor says along with a depressed sounding sigh. He never seemed so into things, just sort of gloomy walking through life. I am surprised he still is even mayor. Maybe people manage to find comic relief from his peculiar personality. It can be slightly humorous.

The escort takes over again kicking her leg into the air leaving the rest of us all rather appalled with it. Anything but normal for sure.

"So should we get this Reaping started?" She nearly sings. The Capitol must love her; I have no idea why though. Her mood makes everyone feel even more somber, her optimistic view much make all these people who are frightened out of their mind see just how much she treats this all like a joke. They need to lighten up.

"Let us pick our female tribute first." She sings again

This is the moment I have also anticipated for. Who will be my District Partner, hopefully someone like Ada from the 60th game and not someone like Theresa. Someone like Ada would be much more fun of a hunt, much more fun to track down and outsmart. It was one of the most brilliant moments to finally see her fall. I guess maybe I should root for my District but to be honest I just root for the winner. The District doesn't affect it.

I try not to set standards because I would hate to be disappointed by it in the back of my head I already am hoping for the perfect enemy. Maybe even a partner in crime that can see level to my own sight and eventually I could stab in the back, it would be such a beautiful display of betrayal. "Fennec Gray!" I immediately start searching to find the owner of this name. I glance towards the eighteen-year-old section in hope, but instead it is a small girl from the fourteen-year-old section.

She walks forward a bit startled but overall all no crying or anything. Which is a pretty good thing. But she still is just a fourteen year old.

Once she is on stage the escort takes things back into control once again happy for the drama. "Onto the boys." She says and I see Fennec resist the urge to groan, the tiniest twitch in the corners of her mouth I can just faintly see from the front of the crowd. She isn't even that far away, I can see her well. I am happy to see she has some fire in her, it well make for an interesting challenge. In the moment I analyze Fennec the escort already has removed a slip of paper from the bowl. I don't worry about jumping to the stage, no one will volunteer for the poor sucker. Won't I be such an angel to bravely take his place? I can just hope the Capitol I have never cared much about know will see it that way, they will find me mysterious and soon they will see I'm not a force to be reckon with. "Bran Farro." The escort sings looking for the boy.

A nervous looking seventeen year old is given away by those who were suppose to support him. What a shocking and tragic moment for him, anyone could see the tragic thoughts swirling through his thoughts.

He is pushed a Peacekeeper and he begins to walk as bravely as he possibly can. Then I realize something, I am seventeen. I will see him walk by. Naturally I didn't even process it until now. I watch him walk through the sea of people who all move away from him like he is diseased. I don't. I stand and watch him, he glares at my pitifully.

"I volunteer!" I say as his dreadful looks turns into one of utter shock and disbelief. I push him out of the way and shout it louder. "I volunteer!" The escort beams upon me.

"We have a volunteer!" She sings and Fennec just stares intensely at me as if to try and figure out my motive. This Bran has red hair and brown eyes with loads of freckles while I have black hair and blue eyes. No one could possibly see us to be related.

I walk in small and confident strides up to the stage and look at the crowd that all look appalled at seeing me here.

"Aeron, seventeen." I say my hands in my pockets.

"Lastname dear?" The Escort asks pushing herself closer to me.

"Than"

"Lovely dear, it is so nice to see a volunteer." She says back staring into the camera and then glances back at Fennec.

I walk back to stand near Fennec. I hear the escort tell us to shake hands. Fennec gets up staring me right in the eyes. We shake hands for only a moment before we both stand there decoding the other. She analyzes me and I do the same, she seems quiet but maybe she does have a brain.

Maybe she will be a challenge after all.

Well then let the Games begin.

* * *

District Eleven

Harsh Greene, 17

After all this time I have never grown to take joy in not belonging. Sure it is interesting to be unique but as much as my mother can tell me it only makes me twice as cool those types of things have gone away as soon as I realize being different means not truly belonging anyone but the other hybrids.

Ok it isn't like Eleven has a racial issue of anything, after all out in the field it doesn't matter if you are black or white as long as you are helping the group. Things are more simple out there, and it isn't like the two different races see each other as aliens they want nothing to do with but somehow almost by instinct we just sort of fall into groups. Call anyone a racist and prepare for hell, but none of us can really help it. Having one black parent and one white parent sort of leaves me sort of in between. People don't know what to do with me most of the time. It isn't like you can't tell; one look and you can see that I am not black or white. What am I? A caramel? That sounds so strong and if someone were to call me "caramel" I would without a thought punch them.

I leave in a neighborhood pretty that sort of just falls into a certain realm my family doesn't fit into. Wherever we go one of my parents is of opposite race and no matter what I am just somewhere in between not really fitting into either group.

Still this is my home and as much as I never have really felt true to one group I still love it here. Mostly because of my family. Or maybe because even with all of that in the end it all just comes down to the fact in the end we are all the same. We all slave in the hot sun and we all slave out here in the hot sun as we prepare to give one boy and one girl to the slaughterhouse to be killed. People from Eleven almost never come back, they just don't. We got sort of close but in the end she was twelve and Rhett was older and had a weapon. Siva sadly enough didn't stand a chance.

I push my way past some trying to get with my age group. I guess that is one thing I know where I stand. I know my age. I know my gender. But it really isn't that Eleven is racist it is just the fact I am just different. Anyone who dares to look at me funny I am not afraid to start a fight with, it isn't something I enjoy it is just after so long I knew I wanted to stand up for myself. So I do even if it is through violence.

Standing in the crowd I glance towards where my mother holds my four-year-old sister next to my father. My father works and my mother has really be in need of breaks lately so I often take care of my little sister. As soon as my sister sees me she gives me a big goofy lopsided smile, I smile back. Better she doesn't have to just see grim frowns today. She doesn't have to know yet, she is just a child.

We all are just children, but it doesn't stop us from being forced into the Games. Not like Eleven ever stands a chance, we are the underdogs. Sadly the Capitol doesn't root for the underdogs most of the time. They root for the bulky muscular careers. The escort Yamane steps onto the stage looking ready for a funeral, it is quite fitting actually.

"Lets get the reaping started." She says dully before nearly throwing the mayor the microphone. He stumbles to get a good grasp on it before stepping up to give his speech A few people call things out but when they do Peacekeepers are right there to make sure they don't squeak another word. Our Peacekeepers were always so awful.

"And back to Yamane." The mayor says as he hands the microphone to the woman. She seems to still be experimenting with looks because last year she was a whole different person. She was cheerful then.

"Females first." She groans and just picks the first slip her fingers touches and clears her throat and leans to the side. "Uh… Akua Scintillant." She says and I hear someone cry. I see people staring at someone but don't see the person, are they short? They must be young, for that I just want to shake my head once again. I dearly hope she isn't another twelve year old like last year. It was so hard to see someone so young be killed. Soon a figure emerges and I realize the reason I didn't see her isn't because she is short.

She is in a wheelchair; I didn't even know people could have wheelchairs but apparently so. She puts on a brave smile trying to not look afraid; she shows off her missing tooth, she must be about fifteen. Everyone is speechless. She doesn't stand a chance, I wish she did because I like to always believe that little guy can beat the big guy but it is easy to see this won't be easy for her.

She reaches the stairs and looks around embarrassed until two Peacekeepers come and lift her up the stairs. She doesn't seem to like the close contact with them but she doesn't have a choice. She makes her way to Yamane. Yamane stares showing the most emotion she has the entire Reaping. It isn't something insulting, it is almost a realization. She shakes it off. "Our female tribute everyone." She says in her normal drawl again. Akua just places herself near the chair. Yamane walks over to the bowl with the boy's name without a word. This is the moment to be worried, I have just this and the next to get through but it feels as if I am hopeless.

"Harsh Greene." Me?

Sadness fills me, as I start towards the stage utterly speechless. I don't even dare to glance at my family as much as I so badly wish to. I must walk to this stage calm though, I cannot break down even if my eyes scream I am. I won't cry.

Reaching the stage I stand next to Akua and we both glance at each other. We share a moment of utter pitiful nature, we are both going to our deaths and we know it.

My eyes act without even my knowledge as I find myself seeing my family standing in awe, my little sister even seems to be upset seeing the rest of her family in such a state. I can't give up, it seems so appealing but I always hated being judged. So I won't let them just see me as another District Eleven male bloodbath, I will be strong and I will give this my every ounce of effort. It is so easy to say and think but once images of putting myself into that Arena manage to seep into my brain I feel my legs want to fall and crumble under me.

This isn't good; I was so close to be in the free. Two Reapings left, now this.

"Shake hands I guess." The escort says with a sigh though she seems to be a bit happier to see me on this stage. She doesn't even glance at Akua and I know it is because of guilt. I realize so suddenly that I almost choke as I realize I am going into the Games with this girl, I might have to kill her.

No I refuse to think of that.

No I can't, she is my neighbor. Well not really but figuratively. She comes from Eleven and I refuse to kill her, sadly enough I probably won't even have to. The thought pushes down on me in a pile of guilt. This is awful, how can I think of all these things? I haven't even shake hands with Akua yet and I am already pushed into survival instinct, sure that could be good but I need to limit myself. I need to protect myself while making sure I don't loose myself in the process. The thoughts are too heavy and eventually they all fall leaving me in an empty pit of thought.

Walking forward I turn to Akua and stick out my hand for her to shake. She takes it looking me right in the eyes as we shake hands. Do the same things run through her head? Is she trying so hard like I to get her mind down to an empty pit of thoughts instead of panic? I feel my head spin.

I take a swallow and the saliva goes thickly down my throat as if it is closing in on me. I feel so utterly lost and trapped. How can I possibly get out of this?

* * *

A/N- Sorry guys for the delay! Things just worked out very unfortunately. First off there is this project I have with my friends and it has taken up so much time and other things that just lead to a not very good timing with this chapter. I am actually not even home right now. I am in a complete different state, but luckily I have a ton of free time and the hotel has wifi so I plan on getting the next chapter up MUCH quicker. I know this only has four parts but that is because twenty-four isn't equally divided by five and all.

So thanks for reading guys I really appreciate the reviews especially if your tribute is involved. I mean if you can't review right away I understand (Hey I do the same thing once and a while) but as long as you review it is fine.

Also when Ecstasy's old trainer calls her a retard I don't mean it in an insulting way it was meant to show that she is a rather awful person. Just wanted to clear that up in case you were wondering... which you probably weren't


	4. Chapter 4 The Wicked and Pained

_**When we are no longer able to change a situation- we are challenged to change ourselves. - Viktor E. Frankl**_

* * *

Chapter Four: The Wicked and Pained

District Eight

Than Jerralds, 18

It is harder than I expected to feel affected by being reaped. Sure at first when I managed to glance to the others it was simple see they were excited at this and even a bit envious of me. At that moment I realized I was achieving something so many of us had wanted, it was great. But even with that it didn't manage to falter my usual neutral attitude. It might be fun and it isn't like I would mind dying, but still.

None of us could take part in the Hunger Games. Not by volunteering at least, we could never do that. The five of us promised. Why? Because it would be suspicious.

We have worked so long and hard to not be suspicious. Just one single hand in the air or mistaken words and the rest of our lives will get much more difficult. Now I am here, no volunteering just pure luck. I am not happy though.

I am not agonized either. I am Than, and like always I am emotionless. With pings of emotion here and there. When I remind myself that one by one all of my friends will say goodbye to me I feel a strange stirring emotion I can't really grasp onto. It just swims around within me. Is it joy? Is it worry? Is it sadness? It feels like a mixture of everything all mixed together into a jar only emerging from such jar ever so often in small puffs.

I tap my fingers on my leg just the slightest anxious to see who will come first. They will all come one by one of course. I know that. We are welded together by our secrets and the fact we push the outside world away, but even within our own circle we keep secrets from others. That is what makes us all promise if we ever are forced into this situation to come one by one.

I hear the door unlock and the Peacekeepers let in the first of the four.

Sira.

She has one of her brilliantly dark and glorious smiles whenever she creeps upon something brilliant. She walks forward wrapping her arms firmly behind me and pulls me close and presses her lips against mine, her warmth filling me with a bitter feeling. One more of the reasons they will all come one by one. After a few moments of embracing each other she pulls her lips away from mine smirking, her arms still wrapped around me.

She was closed to the outside world yet if you were to get a glance at her it was impossible not see how likeable she can be. She just has something about her that draws you in.

"Lucky." She says. "You love this sort of thing Than, this will be easy for you. People will finally encourage what you love to do." She says, she always has been caring for us all. "It has been so long since those days we met and I always knew that you were just like me. You love to kill and finally you can do so and get out of it with enough money that all of our lives will be so much easier. We could bribe people for silence and you yourself would have immunity pretty much." She says.

I give a small chuckle, "I still need to win."

She winks, "I am not worried."

I wish I could say I would miss them so dearly and I would hold them dearly to my heart but I am not sure if I can say so, we are pulled together by our similar needs and the fact we all were never really loners to the outside world. I am closest to Sira, we have had this affair going on for so long. We were the first to start the idea after we discovered we both had a certain need for bloodshed. The thought gives me tingles, it can fill me with joy and Sira was the same way. We have grown in numbers since but in many ways I feel closest to her. Well then again we are together after all.

I twirl a strand of her long, and I mean long, black hair. "I have the locket, it will be my token." I tell her.

She smiles, "Good it will be perfect. That way you won't forget us." We are like a family in many ways.

I nod, "Naturally." I never felt close to anyone. None of us did. That is why we joined. We could be alone from the world together. Since all the others are dead it is just us. I guess in a way I have already been through the Games. We are the last five standing, we killed the others. And got away with it, they think we were the victims. In reality the last one to die, the person everyone is so sure did the killing, was the only innocent one.

The locket has four pictures. One for each of my fellow friends. We all have lockets with the pictures of the others. There is a bit of blood on the pictures but it will fit well as my token.

Taking another breath I look into Sira's eyes. "This will be good." I say. "I either have some fun or die." I don't mind being honest with her. We all keep secrets but ever so often I just want more than other to just be blunt. Even if I am unsure how they will react. But these are the people I am supposed to feel most comfortable with.

"Try would you?" Sira asks.

I smirk, "Would you miss me?"

She shrugs, "You are a good partner in crime." She kisses me on the cheek once more before turning around as her hair dances in the air as she walks to the door. The Peacekeeper begins to open the door as she turns around. "Good luck Than." She says simply with a wink and I nod before she leaves. The Peacekeepers glance at her momentarily before ushering in my next visitor.

As much as Sira brushes it off easily I know she cares for us all, we are her friends after all. And we are lovers; we have been for so long.

Kilan. He is eighteen yet the smallest of us all. The third member of our group to join. He is probably smaller than the size of the average fourteen year old. He always has been stubborn to believe he won't get any bigger but we never really cared. Not like it mattered much anyway. As long as he could finish a kill with ease it was fine. He was always in the home anyway only joining us outside when necessary. We always just said he was still getting over the events, when in fact he could care less about that. Sure he lost a bit of his carefree nature with all the time Sira and I took him on killing trips but he was the greatest shut-in of us all. With his quick to come to conclusion attitude and impulsive attitude it was easy for him to make excuses for how his actions.

His brown-green eyes watch my eyes with his mess of brown hair falling into his eyes like always. He walks in calmly and we exchange glances for a few moments before he speaks.

"I guess you are happy?" He asks.

I shrug, "It can't go bad. I win or die, either way I wouldn't mind." He nods for a moment, not surprised at all.

"We will miss you if you die, it isn't that simple." He says. I nod in acknowledgement.

"I am aware. I understand that, I am not just going to let myself die. I plan on taking as many out as possible. After all I won't even have to cover any of it up. I can enjoy myself. I won't have to worry, I just will need to give them all a show."

"You sound pretty cheerful about it right now." Kilan comments. He always had that urge and joy in murder but he was just so often dragged into the mess by Sira and I. Don't get me wrong it isn't like we made him a killer, in fact we are all better of this way. Less people die this way. We all would probably attempt to kill people left and right. We are stronger together and while as a team it is nearly impossible for our targets to escape it doesn't mean more people die this way. Instead of all five of us getting our own kills we do it together and that is four more people alive each time.

I guess that makes it all so much easier to carry on this way. It isn't like I agree with murder, I just can't help myself.

"Like I said before I can't loose, I want to get back but if I don't…"

"Then you will be gone." He ends my sentence. "I would have thought you would be disappointed you won't have the fun of covering up your steps. You always seemed to love that sort of thing."

"You always have assumed things quickly." I say with a smirk a bit filled with emotion at the fact he quested wrong. Friend or not he is much too impulsive; if we don't enforce him to be less impulsive one day he might get our secrets revealed. He is smart though.

"So what is the truth then?" He asks curiously.

"I just like the thought of getting away with it, and there I will be getting away with it." I say elated to share the truth.

He gives a small smirk.

The Peacekeepers open the door once again and Kilen is escorted out. He walks out casually giving a wave before shoving his hands back into his pockets

"Goodbye Kilen."

"Goodbye Than, I can only hope this won't be our last goodbye." He comments as the door closes behind him leaving me alone. I look to the clock. Some time has passed. Maybe Alec and Otteline will end up visiting together.

I am right. The two youngest of the group, who are also dating, enter. Alec, fifteen with dark wavy brown hair and black eyes that emit sadness I see first. He is pretty tan for District Eight; in Four of course he would still be considered pale but here? Well it isn't like we get much sun. The same goes for Otteline who is the youngest at fourteen. Currently we never really stop to think that she was just ten and Alec just eleven when this all started.

Alec stands tall with Otteline's arm wrapped around his. They are close. Alec always has been closest to Otteline, closed to the world and even us once and a while.

"How do you feel?" Otteline asks me as they got closer to me. These two seem the most how regular Visitors act. Alec always captures gloomy attitude in his eyes no matter what which finally seems normal for the situation. But he always has been able to deal with internal pain. Which just proves the strongest can flourish in pain and sadness. He didn't have to act depressed or reserved for the Peacekeepers to not draw suspicious like some of the others must have.

On the other hand while Otteline never minds to kill she never really loved it, she just knew joining us was survival. It has become her life and to her it is just like any other normal event like going to school. So naturally she also can sport the look Peacekeepers expect from visitors without any trouble.

"I feel fine." I respond and Alec nods.

"I would say good luck but we both know luck does nothing." Alec tells me.

"You don't receive luck you make your own luck." I respond chill as I lean against the elegant wall of the luxurious room.

"You don't need luck, without you we probably would have been discovered already." Otteline tells me with a small smirk creeping onto her face.

"We all help out but we both know if I die you will carry on with no problem."

Otteline sighs, "Just accept the compliment."

I smirk.

"Well let's just hope this is goodbye for just a little while." Alec says. Unlike the others our goodbyes are much more neutral and calm.

"Just don't let my death stop you." I say suddenly.

"Do you plan on dying in there?" Alec says suddenly bringing a bit of tension into the conversation, Otteline steps to the side in a matter to stay out.

"No I am just saying if I do." I respond.

"Of course you wouldn't mind dying." He says back and shakes his head turning around. Otteline takes a moment in conflict before grabbing onto Alec's arm.

"Would you?" I ask making him stop.

Alec turns back around and gives a shrug. "I don't know but you just accept it so easily."

"No use in getting worked up."

"Time is almost up." Otteline says looking at her watch before pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear and looking back up at all of us in a serious matter.

"Goodbye Than." Alec says the tension gone from his voice.

Otteline nods, "Bye." She says biting her lips.

"Goodbye."

The reach the door and open it to a surprised Peacekeeper who looks like he was just about ready to come and get them himself. They give me one respectful nod before leaving down the hall.

That is it.

I have said goodbyes to the only people in my life I have truly grown to know, I might never see them again but it pains me to think I would fret over that. It feels strange though knowing it is over and now I have to get on a train for the Capitol.

It just feels strange.

* * *

District Twelve

Everest Tames, 18

I tap my feet against the ground to match the pestering tapping sound of the clock as it ticks away moment by moment to the time I will be stuffed onto some stupid train to go to the Capitol. The moment I think of it I need to let out a deep breath because too much anger boils up inside of me.

I want to collide my fists with a wall, or anything for that matter. Anything to channel my rage. I have worked so hard to make something of my life here, it mattered to me. I turned my crummy life in the Seam into something. Now it was all being torn from me, everyone would know the truth.

I leaned back into the wall letting my head rest on the wall as I rub my temples stubbornly. I want to cry, but my friend will arrive soon. I have kept this charade up until now and I am not ready to give it up.

The door opens and I snap up to a sitting position and I see Bea enter with her blonde hair pulled back in a tight pony-tail to show of her high cheek bones and sharp blue eyes that pull me in. She is my girlfriend, she loves me but just because I _made _her like me. I made them all like me by pretending and by acting to the point it was almost like I was an actor taking part in a movie twenty four seven.

Bea walks to me and tugs me up from the chair and I pull her close to me as we embrace, I am everything she could ever want. But being the perfect guy is just so tiring. I am exhausted mentally from it all. The last thing I want to do is fulfill her dreams before I am lead to the slaughter.

When I was a child I discovered something, acting is fun. We would just play all these games in the Seam to make our lives more sunny and maybe even smile while our parents slaved away in the mines. Especially when we all knew that was our fate. I didn't have much hope going for me; I was in a different world than all of those much more fortunate. They were in the town and I wasn't. I had olive skin, black hair, and gray eyes. My identity couldn't be hidden.

It was a challenge.

But I had always loved a good challenge.

Bea cries away in my shoulder like she was the one reaped as I hold her tightly. I realized once I begun getting involved with the group of town children that girls had that sort of thing in their minds. Some guy who was mysterious, charming, charismatic, handsome, and would save them from all their troubles. I am not that guy but it didn't keep me from pretending. I wasn't lacking in looks and I had been acting my days away to even get in the group so it was so easy. She thinks of our romance as "forbidden" because her father is rich and mine isn't. She thinks I will save her.

I have no plans of that, but like so many things in my life it never stopped me from doing it anyway.

"How could this happen?" Bea pleads into my shoulder before pulling away to give me a peck on the lips. "I knew I shouldn't have let you taken out tesserae."

Do I keep this up till the bitter end or do I give it up now?

Then again what if I make it?

"I know, I should have listened." I mutter into her ear. She stifles out a sob.

"You will win for me won't you? You will be the first Victor for us in so long, you are so brave I know you can do it."

_Yeah you think I am brave because I made you think that. _For a moment I am more annoyed than ever. Bea always did have a habit of being annoying. But hey no one could deny her looks. She was hot. It was all just trials. All just challenges for me to complete in some twisted game.

At least it doesn't involve murder though. Or death.

"I love you." Bea says through red, tear filled eyes. She looks up at me; this is supposed to be a moment where I say it back. We hadn't said it to each other yet.

"I love you too." I say with all my heart trying not to burst into tears. I don't love her. And now I told her it. Maybe this is too much?

Not like I will probably survive anyway.

"They won't give us much more time together." Bea says her hypnotic eyes staring into my dull gray eyes as I run my fingers through her hair and she goes in for another kiss.

When she pulls away just as the door creeks open I wipe away a tear on her cheek. "Be brave," I tell her.

She nods and looks to the Peacekeepers glaring at them like it will actually affect them in anyway. She isn't the smartest. Never has and never will have to be. Not when her family is rich.

Rich for Twelve at least.

She leaves as two more people come back in. My best "friends" they both are twins looking identical with more dull blue eyes and curls that make girls go crazy for them. They are a bit smarter, but in another more developed Districts they wouldn't be. It is why it was so easy to make them like me.

"Dude this is crazy." Tog says and Fog nods.

Yes that is their names, their mom is practically insane.

"We love you man." Fog says patting me on the back. I got to say for their grades in school they really don't seem it.

"Gay?" I say with a smirk and Tog manages to smiles and so does Fog. They don't even give a slight glare. They know much more than Bea does that I won't come back. Or maybe Bea does and is just refusing to believe it. Sadly I am guessing it is that.

"Seriously give it your all." Fog adds. It makes my heart sink. It is moments like these. They think they are my best friends and they don't even know what my real personality is like.

After a long drawn on goodbye with the twins the Peacekeepers eventually interfere and we share our last goodbyes. I will have many more visitors; I was so very successful at my attempts with acting after all. But only one really matters to me other than my family.

Sure I loved my family but there is a reason I was constantly acting, my life sucked and it was easier that way. The harsh and depressing truth. My dad is always working and my mom is constantly taking care of the baby. A lot have it worse but still. It was still crummier than those of the people leaving in the town. I just refused to accept what I was born with.

Who I await for is Georgia. My "mistress" as they might say. I felt bad at first but after so long it had just become a game to me. I wanted to spice it up and that is where Georgia came in. She was equally as pretty to Bea in my opinion just missing the blonde hair. She had dark hair and blue eyes. After all her mother is from the Seam. She was part of the group but she was always a tad different. She thinks herself to be intelligent and knowledgeable.

It made it so much easier.

To make her think I don't care for Bea and love her more, she believed it so easily. I admit I do favor Georgia but in the end they are just my pieces in my little game.

Bitter truth right there.

I am lucky enough to see the girl walk in next. Her hair surrounds her shoulders in a lovely mess and her blue eyes full of worry. She wraps her arms around me.

"How could this have happened?" She asks looking as sincere as can be as she looks into my eyes nearly pleading with me. "I wanted to scream when she was crying. She just wanted attention." Georgia says glaring at the simple idea of Bea. They used to be friends but then I interfered.

"I know, I know." I mutter trying to comfort her. Though I would really love to have some comforting especially when I am the one Reaped.

"Say you love me." She says suddenly out of the blue.

Seriously twice in one day? I am starting to wonder how much things can get worse. Already have been reaped for my death and not all this. I don't want to try so hard anymore.

"I love you." I say coldly.

"I love you too." She says too busy to notice.

Or maybe she just doesn't care.

I can't even tell the difference anymore.

* * *

District Four

Caleb Depths, 18

I feel my mother wrap her fragile and skinny arms tightly around me. She holds me so close I feel ready to burst from the small woman's grasp. I let out a small chuckle that in no way can fit my mood. I pull away from my mother's bear hug to look at her and my father. They look so proud; this is what I always wanted. I wanted them to look at me with pride gleaming in their eyes and for them to tell me they are proud of me.

But it doesn't feel right, ever since all the things I had been working so hard for had started being put into effect it was just burnt all down. Eighteen years and now because of one idiotic night it is all ruined.

No not ruined, it just seems useless now. It makes me wish I volunteered earlier or maybe could next year. At least if I could have volunteered next year I would have time to deal with it all. Now it has just been a month and things are just different. I am not overflowing with joy of having my parents be proud; it annoys me to the very core. How dare they finally decide to be proud at this moment? Why not all those other times?

I let out a sigh; it escapes me before I can stop it. My father looks curiously at me appalled. "What is wrong son?" He asks a worried look that his son actually might not enjoy being a tribute flashes across his face.

I take a deep breath and quickly pull a smirk across my face and think of a cover up. Over the times I have become quite the liar. "Just a bit disappointed Monica had to volunteer, don't want her father to treat me unfairly." I say. "But it will just be that much better when I win." Through all of the awful mess saying that manages to fill me back up with light.

Things have changed but in the end I still so desperately want to win, even if it won't be with the emotions I had once hoped and dreamed for.

My father lets out a wholehearted laugh that makes me smile as he pats me on the back. The warmth leaves quickly though and it just leaves me even colder than before. It isn't common for parents here to care too much for their kids; they are constantly working to afford the fancy mansions and luxury items. It is so easy to just sneak out and party. Living in one of the nicest areas it was just a regular event, to sneak somewhere where we wouldn't have a worry and drink. It was fun, until things get sour. Just one rotten night ruined all of it.

"Good luck," My mother adds. She is beautiful, but even her with age has been wearied down. A few wrinkles are appearing. I think my father likes that about her though. They love each other for sure, I just wonder if they love me. I got my looks from my mother. Brown hair, more dark than usual for District Four though in the constant sun it has gotten lighter, and bright sea green eyes. Not too mention skin that can tan so easily but not burn quickly. It isn't hard to imagine why my father fell in love with her.

"Thanks guys." I say trying to sport the best smile I can.

"It will be hard but if you put your mind to it you can do anything." My father says as the Peacekeepers open the door to signal their time with me is over. Maybe forever. I hate my father's tacky little pep talks. They aren't like some parents who shove their child into training and force them to volunteer. They just like the idea of boasting about their son. Though if they loved to boast about me so much they should give a shot at actually talking to me with something other than small talk more than just once a week.

I can't think of that now, they are leaving. I won't see them for a bit but I know deep in my hurt this won't be the last time I see them. I refuse to let it fall to that. I can't die in there.

"I love you guys." I say suddenly nearly holding back tears that magically have appeared at the worst moment.

They look surprised but I have volunteered so maybe they do love me now. "We love you too." My mother says as they are ushered out of the room. I fall backwards to the wall and slip down to the floor. I am not even sure if I will have anyone else visit. I haven't really been the most popular lately.

I don't blame them. It is my fault. It was my entire fault. We were drunk and though the best thing was to go down to the ocean for a midnight swim. It was thrilling to rush down through the sands and strip down to our underwear before diving into the chilly yet still rather warm water. It felt nice and even sobered us up a bit to enjoy it to the fullest. It was dark and we were idiots. We didn't bother to care that the waves were harsher than ever and swimming relaxed and drunk in the dark was not going to work out. Soon enough everyone gave up a little joy killed but they were safe. It was just Frak. Frak was still out of it and called us wimps and such for leaving the water. Everyone didn't know what to do and just stood quietly drying off as he yelled and cursed at us. He was my best friend but he sure could be a jerk when he wanted to.

Eventually I just groaned and went into the water trying to find him when a wave came in pushing me underwater, but after all that had happened I was practically sober as can be.

But Frak wasn't.

I take deep breath once again and am surprised when I see someone walk in. I didn't think anyone would visit. I am an only child after all. Part of me hopes it will be a friend who wants to bury the hatchet before I leave to become Victor but it is one of my trainers.

Maybe the disappointment on my face is clearly evident because he laughs. "Looks like you are happy to see me." I let a smile creep onto my face, I am happy though a little disappointed. After all I bet Monica doesn't have her trainer saying any meaningful goodbyes to her.

"No I just was expecting someone else, but to be honest I think I am more glad it is you." I say and we give each other the pat-on-the-back sort of hug before separating.

"And who would that be?"

"No one important."

It isn't a lie, they aren't important to me. They were once but that seems ages ago.

_"Frak come on where are you?" I call out into the darkness trying to adjust to the darkness as I push myself to the surface. Every instinct I have developed in training begins to rush through me. Where is he?_

_ "Frak this isn't funny anymore!" One of the girls from the shore calls out. I am too busy to figure out whom. It is hard to swim and my limbs are starting to loose steam. I can only hope Frak managed to sober up a bit._

_ Then through the sound of crashing waves is a blood-curling scream as I look in the direction of the source maybe fifty meters away. Frak. I push myself stubbornly through the water urgent to get to the asshole and beat him up for not just getting out of the water with the rest of us._

_ The waves work against me but I remember all those times long ago when we were kids, he is my best friend. _

_ "Frak?" I call out when I reach the area about where I saw him. Struggling just to keep above the surface I see a splash and dive under the water hoping the moonlight will give me just enough lighting to see him. I am lucky enough his hand is extended up towards the surface because the dim light reflects of his tan hand. I rush forward and grab his hand. He is heavy and limp, he passed out. Frightened I let go of his hand and desperate for air I go to the surface and call out for help from the others. It feels like some distant scream that I almost think it isn't mine. Focused I dive back under just barely managing to grab his hand and yank him up and over more shoulder._

_ Heart beating as fast as the waves that work against us I look ahead to one of the burliest males of the groups swimming towards us. I just need to get us close enough to shore that the waves push us forward. _

_ My eyes burn from the salt and my mouth reeks of sea water so much I want to vomit but I have to keep going. Worry pulsing forward I am so glad for all those days working out that make it a bit easier to tug along Frak. He was always so tall and muscular even before we had muscles._

_ The burly male reaches us and my heart does a backflip of relief, until I realize Frak is still passed out and we are still in the middle of the ocean in the worse possible time._

_ It goes in flashes before finally we reach the shore, dragging Frak along in the sand. I shiver freezing cold but I don't bother to wrap a towel or anything around me. Everyone crowds around his body. A girl gives him mouth to mouth and tries to help get water out of his system but he doesn't move. We bring him to the hospital; after all it wasn't our fault. The beach is constantly open and we did warn him and try to help him. But I was the least of worried about being blamed._

_ Frak was died. And he was never coming back._

After that I didn't go to parties anymore, everything felt wrong. Everything felt like I lie. My mind set changed so much I barely enjoyed the fact I was going into the Hunger Games.

"You can do this Caleb, you always have been the star of your grade. This is your shining moment." My trainer says and I give a sullen nod.

"Of course."

* * *

District Three

Mae Juniper, 17

I wipe away a tear, nothing I could do now. My name has been called and I am stuck in this place now. It was so displeasing. I always was able to get myself out of whatever sort of trouble I had, it was easy. My intelligence is high even for this District from my father, because of that my father was rich and got my beautiful mother to love him. I don't deny that truth; I don't even care much since I like to think they love each other now for beyond wealth or looks. But because of it I have the looks and the smarts, it was a gift.

A blessing.

If I couldn't outsmart my way out of a problem I forced my out by playing my looks. Maybe do a small favor for someone and a problem can be solved. If you could wouldn't you? It isn't like they think that whatever I do for them is anything beyond getting what they want, and any idiot who would think I actually had feelings for them just from one hookup deserves to have his heart broken.

But now?

Nothing.

I manage to cheer myself up the slightest by thinking that the Peacekeeper would probably go for it, but in the end he would just turn me in anyway. I am getting on that train no matter what I do.

Unless I end it right here and now, but that isn't happening. I have worked too long and hard to establish my reputation among my peers and I honestly like my life. I am not like the awkward freak that is that Jean kid. I guess I should start thinking of ideas to get close to him. After all he isn't one to be the most good socially, everyone knows that. Also the fact he is constantly writing poems and writing all over his arms.

Apparently he has never heard of ink poisoning, but anyway he will be an easy target. I could get him to be my ally and he could help me. I need to start thinking this way now if I want to get out alive.

The door opens pulling me for my planning to see my mother and father. I am a younger version of my mother; raven black hair and deep gray eyes. They are okay parents I guess, my father did teach me the value of using intelligence. Sure some people say it is manipulating but honestly it is their fault for allowing themselves to be tricked. It is survival of the fittest. That is how my father became rich after all.

My mother can be a bit shallow, constantly trying to maintain her beauty as she refuses to think she might be loosing it. But she always has been there to teach me how to braid hair and such. They both provide aid for me, and for that I love them.

Much better than some of the parents of my fiends though.

I like to think I am tough, I always have thought I was but here I stand crying and into my parent's shoulders. I hold them tightly to me. I don't want to go. I can plan as much as I do on a regular basis but I can't deny I am scared.

"Mae how could this happen? You didn't even have tesserae." My mother asks wet eyed. It makes me even more upset.

"I know this is ridiculous!" I cry out, I understand why someone like Jean would be reaped. But me? I am important! People care about me; I have something to live for. I don't think Jean doesn't but I sure do have more than he does. I have the friends to prove it.

"I will make sure you will not starve in there." My father tells me in a comforting voice.

"Huh?" I ask.

"Your father has made friends dear, they can sponsor you. You are so smart and beautiful you have to win." My mother says with the eyes that I know is from the fact she sees herself in me.

I feel my heartbeat slow down a bit in comfort. I don't loose, I get what I want and that is the end of this. I refuse for now to be any different.

I clench my fist and wipe away the tears and hug my parents once more. "Thank you so much guys!" I say. They will get me through this safely, they have to! They are my parents after all.

"No problem sweaty, good luck darling. We love you." My father says as they head to the door making me want to tear up. They are here and then they are gone. At least they managed to calm me a bit down for whoever comes next. I would hate the thought of looking like a mess around one of my friends. I need to keep up a good reputation after all especially if I don't come back, I do want them to grieve me after all.

But I don't loose and I won't now.

Flick comes next, my best friend. We spent all the morning getting ready; we never expected one of us would be reaped. It was beyond our possibilities. She looks so utterly shocked.

"This is awful!" She whines to me as we hug each other tightly but not so much to mess up my hair. The Capitol will respect my class, especially when such thing is so rare here in Three. Everyone here just cares about intelligence and all, which is important but there is much more to things also. Though I don't know what I would give up, my smarts or my beauty. But hey I was given both and I am keeping it that way.

Flick understands that. She is similar to me, except she was lucky enough to have golden blonde hair and gray eyes. Very rare. We both were rare; it is why we went so well together. With my power to get people to agree with me and her blonde hair that stands out so easily, we are a perfect pair.

"I know," I say feeling pitiful again.

"What will I do without you?" She cries out through sobs that don't well for her when it comes to looks. Her faces crunches up, but I don't care. She is crying for a pretty darn good reason so I can look past the makeup running down her face.

"I am not dead yet." I say perching my hands on my hips.

She looks up with a slight amount of hope flooding into her eyes through the entire morose attitude that had been showing. "Yes, you will be Victor. You can do it Mae you always did love a challenge."

I nod, this one I rather just leave be though. "Yeah I can handle this."

"Good because I don't look good in black." Flick says jokingly and we embrace in a hug once more. She jokes but somehow it still feels strange, so eerie.

"I won't loose, I haven't before and I never will." I say. I need to calm myself down, part of me feels more reassured but I can't get my mind of the thought of those careers. I can't get my mind of the idea of Rhett, who got through so much at the showdown. I am smart and pretty but I need to be strong, I just don't know if it is possible.

* * *

After Flick came a few more people came and the discussion was all the same, you won't loose you never had before. It was so easy to doubt myself though, I don't know what I will do if I didn't get what I so desperately wanted. I guess I just won't let myself not retrieve what I want.

Once the last visitor is escorted out I realize my time here is coming short. I never liked Three too much. It is just so depressing and all. But it is all I have known other than seeing pictures of the Capitol my father shows me from his work trips there. He doesn't travel often but when he does he would always bring my mother and I something back.

I feel my self sadden at the thought.

I am not ready to leave.

I see a Peacekeepers walk through the door and grab each of my arms like I am some sort of criminal. It makes me angry, how dare they treat me like this. I am just too exhausted. Managing to free my arm to flip my hair I get ready for the cameras that are surely waiting outside for Jean and I. Speaking of the devil I see him leaving his room for goodbyes with red cheeks and watery eyes.

A bit embarrassing, especially since he must know they will be watching us go to the train but whatever floats his boat. I guess it will be easy to have him wrapped around my finger. Ought to start early, I can take time to be sad later.

"Hey Jean you okay?" I ask flashing my gray eyes.

He looks up at my shocked and reaches up to wipe away tears as if he believes I might have not noticed. After gathering himself he mumbles of a few words before replying. "Yeah… you?"

"Yeah will it will be interesting to see the Capitol." I say giving him a comforting smile. It is truthful; it is definitely something slightly optimistic about this all.

"Yes." He replies as we are ushered outside with our hands behind our backs. We are silent walking outside but once we are I can already see the train pulled up not too far away. The train tracks are close enough to the Justice Building for a reason much like this.

My heart beats as fast as the train will be moving soon. We are pushed onto the stairs and give a shove up the stairs. They leave us be and Jean stares as the engine begins to run as we start to slowly move. He seems worried.

"Come on," I say patting him on the back trying to get him into the door since he is blocking my way. When we are on the train we both find ourselves startled by the inside of it. But the shock of the luxurious train doesn't last long as we quickly move to windows and watch District Three slowly disappear out the window.

And before we know it the District is gone over the horizon. And in a way in my heart it feels like it was never there to begin with.

* * *

Hey guys! Sorry for the delay of the chapter, I have had testing all this week and had to make a bunch of homework up from last week when I missed three days of school. Not fun.

So I know this is once again only four parts but to be honest I really don't like writing goodbyes (which also was reason for delay) but I really am looking forward to the Train Rides so I should be updating often now. Though keep in mind these chapters are pretty darn long.

IMPORTANT:

You can start making suggestions for alliances, but remember I get final word.

If your character hasn't been mentioned yet don't have hard feelings, it is just for some characters I wanted their intro to be interacting with others so yeah.

Remember: I get no hard feelings if you correct me on something with your character or remind me of something about them. There are twenty-four tributes, only one of them is mine (Everest), other than remembering to review so I know you are reading you guys should definitely remind me about your tributes I am not even close to being perfect and a reminder with something with your character is wonderful. So please I hate the thought of you guys not being completely pleased with how I write your characters.


	5. Chapter 5 Off to the Capitol

_**Those who stand for nothing fall for anything.- Alexander Hamilton**_

* * *

_Chapter Five: Off to the Capitol_

_District Two_

_Malice Alen, 17_

I sit with my legs propped up onto the table in front of the couch. Alexis sits next to me looking rather awkward with herself as we watch the Reapings. My first look at all the people who will stand in my way, I crack my knuckles and wonder what to expect.

District One is first, a rather important District because most likely they will be my allies and I sure as hell expect to be the leader so I want to know if any of them will make that a problem. Because I sure as hell am not ending up like Harzard. That idiot got what he deserved. I have something to prove, and I have someone to prove wrong.

My father is an asshole that much is obvious. He just always loved that my brother was training to be a Peacekeeper and just thought of me as trash just like my mother. Well I can see why my mother left the big buffoon. He thinks I am trash; he won't think that when I come back victorious and punch his face in.

The girl naturally is a Volunteer. She looks strange, maybe pretty but there is something off about her. To be honest she looks like one of the Victors from Two that got on drugs.

Great that means she is probably a druggie herself. I just hope she can hold her ground with us, this year I refuse to let the Careers be weak. Sure Patrick won two years ago but he was barely even a career. No smartass will be bombing us and I won't be getting stabbed in the back.

The boy seems pretty dull but fairly strong looking, good. I doubt he will want to be the leader and he looks pretty emotionless so that could be helpful. But he doesn't seem to be anything I can't handle. Exactly what I was hoping for.

"Take notes kiddies." Brutus our mentor says as he stretches his plump arms behind his big meaty head. He makes me sick. I might admire him for winning but he seems like a real idiot. Arrogant. That is what kills our tributes; they are all a bunch of meatheads and rarely anything more. I guess I must seem just like some arrogant an asshole who just cares about looking good and working out. I am not as arrogant as people like Brutus. I might not be as smart as some District Three kid but I am no idiot. I will make that fairly clear soon.

"Yup," I say popping my lips at the p sound.

Nothing really exciting happens for Three. Pretty usual tributes except the District Three girl is pretty good-looking which she could use to her advantage but she doesn't seem like she will get too far with her whiny attitude. The guy on the other hand I don't have a clue on at the moment. He could be like Zai last year or the one from two years ago. I hope he is more like last year's tribute, he didn't get far. But you never know.

And back to a Career District. I stand a bit taller in my spot so I can get a good idea of them.

Both Volunteers. The girl is probably the best looking out of the three and the guy seems a bit threatening in terms of him wanting to be leader but I don't have any worries about it.

"What do the two of you think it all?" Brutus asks us as if the Reapings are over. I want to shout at him something around that but I just shut up and let Alexis do the talking. She seems so uncomfortable in her body I think she will take any opportunity like this. She is a big girl not doubt, but not in fat. In muscle. I don't really give a shit if she isn't hot because she looks like she can pick a fight with any guy and she isn't too confident so she well do the Careers good. And when I want her gone, with her confidence it shouldn't be a problem.

Tapping my fingers together I try my best to pay attention, hell we might even have an outlining tribute wanting to join so I want to get a good idea of every single one of them.

District Five has a male Volunteer and he seems pretty prepared which is a little unsettling but I will just have to hope he is insane and that is why he volunteered. Maybe he will even be a career. Who knows, anything could happen. The girl doesn't stand out to me, a bit young but that is all I notice. Her annoyed look though is a bit humorous. Have to give her credit for that.

District Six isn't anything interesting. A girl who seems to have issues or something and a tired looking fourteen year old.

Seven perks my interest a bit again when I realize it is twins, sucks for them. The male even faints. Way to be the man, it seems as if the girl is tougher than him. The Peacekeepers have to carry his passed out body to the stage as his sister is held back from running to him.

If I hadn't been through so much myself I think my heart would even go out for them. But this is the Games and I see pain every single year, it is just how it is.

What am I supposed to do about it?

"Twins…" Alexis whispers.

"Unlucky bastards." Brutus says laughing.

He just keeps on proving my point.

A bit aggravated from Brutus I sink into the plush couch and glance to the Escort who sits brushing her hair and not even focusing too much on anything but doing such.

The dark and grim atmosphere of District Eight replaced the woodland of Seven. I can see their newest Victor on the stage. A name around Enya or something is called out. I am run my fingers bored through my hair until I see a patch of auburn hair get focused on by the camera. A girl emerges from the crowd, kind of young looking. Fifteen? She interests me; I don't know why she is just interesting. Maybe it is that look in her eyes. Or how long her hair is. When the camera focuses in on her she pushes hair behind her ears and I can piercings on her ear. How the hell did she even get those? I don't really care. She just interests me.

I stare at her following her with my eyes as she walks to the stage. What is it that is so interesting about her? I can't but my finger on it but I can only recognize it.

"Looks like an easy kill?" A voice says. I am snapped from my thinking and look to Brutus.

"Something like that." I respond and catch Alexis looking at me, when I meet her eyes she looks back to the screen. I never really can get a straight forward thought about her. My head just flashes through opinions of her. But as stated before she will be useful in the Games, that is all that should matter to me.

But like the thing that makes me curious about this Enya girl, it does matter.

The male seems strong, maybe even a career. Something in his eyes disturb me though, he might be a good career but I won't ask him and he won't ask us to join. Something just stops me from wanting him to join.

An Avox brings out some food and Alexis just stares at it uneasily as Brutus takes a big handful of the food. It is some sort of hard candy I don't really know the name of but it seems familiar, my father might be an asshole but he is a filthy rich asshole. Like so many in District Two, I guess it is just our culture. Everyone sees us as harsh and brutal killers, and maybe that just forces us to be that way.

My stomach growls a bit at the idea of the candy even though I just stuffed myself with food before. I pick up a piece and toss it into my mouth and let the flavor spread on my tongue as District Nine's reaping turns on and I no longer can see Enya, oh well I will get to see her once I get to the Capitol and I will probably see her face in the sky once before the end of this.

A twelve year old is reaped from Nine, they never have been lucky. Last year was probably the best they have had in a while. They accomplish more than Twelve though.

A boy is reaped, strong looking and waves to the camera. He is faking it. Oh well maybe if he can pull of that he could join us.

I turn back to look at the others. Including the female mentor, the escort, and Alexis. No. He might not be hopeless but he isn't like us. Nearly none of them are like us.

Other than the usual strong looking District Ten girl nothing really stands out to me much for the District.

By the end of the Reapings I can feel my body getting more and more exhausted, all the activity from the day taking a toll on me.

"Well time for bed kiddies." Brutus tells us.

Alexis nods and I just stare at him, "Whatever you say." I respond.

"That's right! Maybe you can listen."

This is the man in charge of my life?

* * *

_District Five_

_Fennec Gray, 14_

"So in case two haven't heard Caesar got this new lovely hairdo which is rainbow! Imagine that! It looks pretty though, it works good on him." The escort keeps talking and talking making me sink further and further into me seat.

_It works well on him, not good. _I think annoyed how the woman who has enough money to probably feed Twelve for an entire month yet she can't even speak with proper grammar as simple as when to use well instead of good in your sentence. I have always had a tendency to be annoyed by that sort of thing but it annoys me a little bit more now.

Is it because I have been reaped at just the age of fourteen? Is it because this woman needs to shut up? Is it both? Probably both, the two combined just paint my face into a straight line that won't falter at what it hears or sees from my surroundings. Aeron is just beyond strange. Some people might see him as a good person for volunteering for some random stranger but I just think it makes him an insane man. Which if I stare at him at the corner of my eyes it is almost like he is just smirking away satisfied as can be to be sitting here.

When we first got on the train he looked so excited and said he always had wanted to see the inside of the train.

OK yeah this stupid train is great and all but that is just _weird. _Weird is great most of the time but it was unsettling to see him not at all effected with what is waiting for us.

"Finish your meal kids, you could use some fattening up before the Games." The male mentor tells us and I just push around a fancy looking miniature potato around my plate before stabbing it with my fork and eating it. The food is great but my appetite isn't.

Why should it?

Sighing I try to eat some more, he is right after all. I could use the food. It will help me for thinking also. I need to start thinking. I know from school that a common defense mechanism is that sort of thing. It is called intellectualization. It is when someone avoids emotions to focus on the intellectual aspects. I am pushing away the emotions attached to being reaped and focusing on figuring out how I am going to get through this.

Maybe it isn't the best thing but I don't care if it gives me a better chance than to just die in the bloodbath. Last year that near insane twelve year-old got second.

And what choice do I have? To just wallow in misery?

Hell no.

"So what do you think of the idea of allies?" Aeron says interrupting the escort who looked ready to start rambling on again. I am grateful for that but I really don't feel like dealing with him right now.

Then again it could be the right opportunity to actual figure something out about him.

"I am unsure, matters if I can trust them or not." I say which is actually pretty truthful. Allies seem great but I want to get out alive, not be stabbed in the back during my sleep by someone I thought I could trust.

"You know we would make a good pair, you would be like my sidekick." He says with a smile, I don't believe it for a second. How can he smile so quickly after getting here? Well after all he didn't volunteer, but why?

I can't figure out exactly what is up with him but I just know I want to separate him from myself as much as possible.

"Sorry but I am no one's sidekick." I say staring him dead in the eyes. Something flashes in his eyes for the quickest moment, too quick for me to read.

"Shame," he says with more of a smirk as he turns back to his food to finish eating.

"Reapings are being shown soon." The female mentor tells us as she looks at her watch. Great now I can find new ways to make myself fell more hopeless as I see all the much older tributes that are sure to be reaped.

"Great," Aeron says as he wipes the side of his mouth with a napkin. I wonder what his family thinks of volunteering, maybe they are proud. I can't imagine how they raised him to end up like this.

My family is pretty normal, they love and nature the fact I actually enjoy learning and I love my little brother. We never had too much or too little. We were normal. I loved that; it allowed me to just stay under the radar. So people just sort of ignored me, and I was okay with that. It will help me now. I don't want allies. I don't want enemies or anything. I just want to keep one-step ahead and try to outsmart them.

Besides my mind is sharper than any weapon they can put in that Arena. I am not exactly sure of my plan behind just being sly but I do know I will have one, and I plan on having it include winning.

I hear the TV turn on and look to see the escort turning channels till she gets to Caesar's face. He is talking to some girl who I think is the new Gamemaker. She looks pretty young.

Then it turns to the District One reaping. Getting up from the dinning table I move over to the couch in front of the TV and carefully watch the Reapings. And the others soon are next to me scattered on the plush couch and chairs surrounding the screen.

As I watch I twirl one of the cream colored strands of hair that escaped from my usual bun I sport. Eventually I see my name being called and see myself walk to the stage. For a moment I try as much as I possibly can to look at myself how some random person would see me. Whither it is a possible Sponsor or a fellow tribute. I have freckles and golden hair that it tightly pulled into a bun. I look more mature than the average fourteen year-old. I do seem well kept though as I walk to the stage. Overall I look rather forgettable. No one would see me as an easy kill despite my age but I doubt anyone would see me and see a threat that needs to die.

Perfect.

After the reapings are over and the escort turns the TV off it is silent for a few moments as we all sit there wondering what is next. All the District get to the Capitol at different times, from the moment we get off the train we are taken to our stylists. That means Twelve is at the disadvantage and the closer ones at an advantage. But the Capitol doesn't have to be fair; they just do whatever they want.

I believe we will get there somewhere early in the morning, maybe extremely early. Fun. But there will be time for sleeping later. And then the Games, which I doubt sleep will come easy.

"Time for bed." The Escort says clapping together her happily.

I get up without another word and slip down the hall to where there the two tribute rooms face each other. Great, now in the morning the first person I will get to see will probably be Aeron. Wonderful.

Each door has a nametag on it, obviously it looks to be something quickly made after we were reaped, so it probably the least luxurious thing on this train. Then again I think my dress might be that but whatever.

"Goodnight Fennec, see you in the morning." Aeron says reaching his doors and giving me a smile that disappears as soon as it appears. With our back turned to each other we both enter our rooms and with that I am on my own.

The room isn't too large, but it still manages to have a large plush looking bed that looks so appealing right now. But I want to clean up first. Naturally a bathroom is attached. I should enjoy all of this, this room alone must cost more than my entire house, but it feels so diabolical. We are just going to be shoved into hell soon anyway.

I go into the bathroom and take out my bun. My loose natural curls fall down; I had my hair down for the reaping and put it back up on the train. It feels sort of nice down. It is in my face though.

Washing my face I enjoy the cool splash of water before removing my shoes and walking over to the plush bed not bothering to change out of my dress.

My head on the pillow I pull the covers over me in hope I can get just a bit of sleep before arriving at the Capitol. But I have my doubts.

* * *

_District Six_

_Cara Meridius, 18_

I watch as Elian pushes the food around on his plate, he doesn't seem too hungry. Or maybe he is just too use to food to appreciate it much. It isn't hard to figure out he comes from wealth after all. Though he looks anything but like one of the children that come from the rich side of town that are always clean and tidy. Actually he looks quite opposite, but his clothing gives him away.

Just like you could probably see from looking at me I am not exactly poor nor rich. I take a big bite from one of the pieces of honey-glazed chicken as I look down and run my fingers along my reaping dress. A sea-foam colored laced dress that ends six inches or so above my knees. It isn't plush, but it isn't ratty either.

Still I can manage to take joy in this sort of food even if I never have had trouble keeping myself from starving. It is just so… unique. I know I need to take joy in these next view days. After all I will need something to take away my misery from having to spend all my time around these freakish looking Capitol residents.

And of course the fact I could very possible never come home. I am supposed to have a one in twenty-four chance but mixed in with the careers and just my natural unstable self I feel as if those chances maybe morph to one in fifty.

As one might see, I have quite the self-esteem.

Letting out a sigh I take another large bit of food and just focusing on eating and not on worrying over all the things I could spend ages getting all anxious over.

Elian is rather quiet; I imagine we are rather similar in that way. His eye show sleep deprived that mine would probably show also if it wasn't for my body forcing myself to, "sleep"

A cold shiver runs down my spine, bad thoughts.

My hand trembles slightly in anxiety as I push back a blonde strand of hair behind my ear and take a long swig of water from the crystal glass cup. My mentor gives me a funny glance. That is how they do it apparently, after getting rather stressed after last year as they told us they decided they would just individually pick one tribute to mentor each. They believe this will be best for us. They must have been so disappointed to see us.

A younger male who looks like he doesn't know what hunger feels like and looks slightly psycho, and then an older female tribute but damn doesn't she just look like she is about to go and run into a corner? Then again walking to that stage I managed a rather neutral face, but now it just feels like I can't even allow myself to blink with worrying I will fall into one of my blackouts.

"Are you okay?" My mentor asks me, the female one. She is much younger. Much more stable, I should probably remember her Games but for some reason I don't. Obviously she would be the better choice for mentor other than the psycho looking male mentor who will be in charge of Elian's life. I should feel lucky, she has decided I have more of a chance than this boy for some reason.

But in a way I feel ashamed that even a few hours in Elian's chance of survival has already been lowered just because these two decided.

No, I need to stop thinking that way. That sort of thinking has been left in District Six. I need to be fierce. I can just hope if I live those emotions will still be waiting for me when I get back.

"Yeah I am perfect, can't wait to go and fight for my life." I mutter sarcastically to my mentor. She frowns but just nods in disappointment and goes back to eating her own meal.

Great.

I can feel myself drawing tired, but for now I manage to focus by looking out the window and putting all my attention to the scenery that passes by in a blur.

I sort of fell myself loosing connection with the people around me and don't get drawn back in until I feel the escort's hand on my shoulder. Snapping away from looking at the world that moves in flashes outside I see the other four moving over to the area with the TV.

"We are going to watch the other Reapings now." The escort says and I instinctively push her hand off my shoulder and get up. A feel a presence behind me and turn around to see an Avox. Startled I jump but manage to see the small cup on a plate that she holds out for me.

"Huh?" I ask and take it from her as she shoves it towards me. I look down at the brown liquid.

"Hot chocolate," I hear the escort say over my shoulder making me jump once more and the beautiful looking teacup flies from my shocked jump and clashes onto the ground the liquid spilt all over the equally beautiful looking maroon carpet.

"I'm so sorry." I say feeling as anxious as ever. The Avox gives me a sympathetic look before hurrying off to grab the wastebasket and get on the ground beginning to collect the bigger pieces of glass.

"Sorry dear!" The escort says in her ever-annoying ascent.

"No problem… it is just I am still thirsty." I say and think of what to ask for. I can ask for anything. All the things I could never afford before. For an instant I think of alcohol. It would probably but me right into a peaceful sleep.

But I can't. I have pushed away these thoughts for so long, why are they starting now?

Because my problems have just gotten ten times worse.

The escort looks at me with wide eyes waiting for me to finish.

"Could I have orange juice?" I say quickly and the escort nods.

"Sure I will find an Avox to fetch that for you."

* * *

I rest on the bed I will be sleeping on tonight, it all passed by in a flash. Just like everything outside. Is anything moving slowly here? Here, what is here? This train? Panem?

Which each face I saw I looked and saw someone who will die, someone who will kill me. Someone stronger than me. Someone weaker than me.

But most of all I saw a human that I might have to kill.

That scares me.

Then again for all I know I could be a murderer. Sure I have always had the nightmares that would give me some sort of insight to what my unconscious self had done but things were never clear. The first time it happened it was nothing like how it really happened but in the end I had realized it was me who had trashed the place.

Right now though? I can't imagine killing.

Maybe it will do me good, it could guide me to freedom. But the possibility of loosing myself in that process just sends me into a even stronger anxiety.

At home my parents never did realize what was wrong with me, maybe any other person would have but I like to believe they just see the good things about me. The things I am proud of and not ashamed of.

But at this moment I am afraid with all the terror I have been through I don't know what I might do. It makes me anything but restful.

I quickly snap into a sitting position and jump off the large bed. Making my way to the bathroom door I look at the lock. It was idealistic to even imagine it would lock from the outside. I have a closet in my room that has that sort of lock, it has served me well.

I enter the bathroom and look around. The shower, toilet, and sink. I catch my reflection in the mirror and take a look at my short figure. Pale skin, blonde hair, and blue eyes that looks rather unstable. Great.

After some moving around I gather all the pillows and the sheets and carry them into the bathroom. Removing one of the pillowcases I tie it giving me just enough space to slip through and tighten it to a not to close the door. Good enough. Then with that done I place the sheets and pillows on the floor. Whatever happens I refuse to let myself leave this room. Taking a deep sigh I lay down on the ground and place my head on a pillow and just hope that knot will keep me from doing anything foolish in any blackout of mine.

* * *

_ District Ten_

_Cavallo Hernadez-Caballos, 18_

Taking my spot I plop down next to Corrie who just continues looking straight ahead. For some reason I knew it bothered her how easy going I was. How I somehow managed to get to that stage without breaking down and actually did it as if it was all some joke. I know she didn't like my jokes or how I act.

That is all right though, she is a bit uptight and usually that would be of annoyance but I guess now more than ever I can comprehend that just because we both are tributes now. I just can't understand how she has no problem with allowing her last few days to end up like how she seems to be making sure they will end up.

I just glance towards the screen and try not to focus too much on it. I just give a silent pledge I will get her to laugh at least one time before that clock starts ticking down to the sure to come Bloodbath.

The reapings start off with naturally District One. Both are volunteers, not too shocking with the District. But the girl seems a bit shaky and looks like she could use a meal. The opposite of Corrie who was five feet of muscle, though she still managed to look feminine of course.

The boy also looks rather dull. He could use a good laugh also. I always made people laugh back in Ten. From hanging out at the farm with the animals to just brighten up the mood. Call me crazy; I will just blame the heat.

Besides what good is it to be miserable? Even if I know I could very easily die in a few days. Even though I know I might never live to see another year. To me that is all easy to digest quickly and just move on to the next stage. That next stage being planning. I have lots of planning to do.

I have a sort of unique look to me, I guess people have told me I am good-looking and all but that isn't it. My skin is more naturally tan and my dark hair and eyes all so common in my family. Sort of like that girl from Eight last year, she is what people use to call Asian. Well my family is what people use to call Hispanic before it was just Panem and one of the closest countries with Hispanics called Mexico was nearly flooded completely.

I guess sometimes it bothered me to have that sort of unique look to my family and I but now it will do me best. Plus I have no problem just being seen as a pretty face. I want to live after all.

Maybe it is scary, that I can just absorb that without a second though. But right now isn't time for fears.

For District Two the usual strong looking tributes are chosen. Especially the girl, she isn't much of a looker but she looks just as intimidating as the boy.

"They are the same height about." I joke; the girl is pretty tall after all.

"Not like she can help that." Corrie snaps back at me. My smirk falls.

"It wasn't supposed to be an insult, if anything it was a compliment. She could probably take on the guy in a fight." I say trying to save myself. It wasn't like I was trying to be mean or anything. I have always had the tendency to have pretty corny jokes but that didn't seem like one of them. Oh well.

Afterwards District Three comes on with a very intelligent and determined yet scared looking kid. He is probably older, so that is something on his side. Then there is a rather obnoxious looking girl who has a fit. Not what I was really expecting for someone from Three but I guess all Districts have to have at least one jerky girl.

Four is the last career District and it doesn't fail to please. Both strong looking competitors. Just fabulous.

Letting out a sigh I dig myself deeper into my spot on the couch.

Corrie glances at me with a curious look. "I didn't know you could even show and signs of remorse." She says. I smile hoping she will give me a smile back but she just shakes her head. "Never mind," she says and the smile falls once again.

Once again trying to stop myself from worrying about it I look to see the District Five female tribute already on the stage. A younger girl, shame. Then out of the blue is the volunteer. Another surprise. Sure is a unique batch of tribute for Five this year. First a younger tribute then a volunteer.

Makes me wonder what was going through his mind when he volunteered for what looked like a complete stranger, nothing good I suspect.

Six both has some tired looking tributes. Another younger tribute and then an older tribute. The girl looks fairly tough though even if she seems afraid. I guess I can't blame that fear in her eyes. I suppose some part of us all has fear. Even if I manage to try and shove it down. Even Careers, maybe as they stand on that stage they have cold feet just the tiniest bit.

Then siblings are reaped for Seven. It runs shivers through us all in a silence that turns slightly awkward. The brother faints and for that moment where it shows the girl's face it is almost painful. She looks so pained.

I find myself looking away until the flashes of green turn to flashes of gray and I turn back sure it is now Eight.

A fifteen year-old girl is reaped with long hair. Like really long hair. Man, does she just not cut it?

The boy is really unsettling in a way, not too sure why. He just has a strange aura to him. Could be a real competitor.

District Nine replaces the gray polluted sight of Eight. I start to watch more carefully now. I want an ally, but I much rather have it from the outer Districts. Maybe ten and beyond but I can consider Nine too.

The boy is reaped first. Micah is his name and I believe he is about sixteen. He is a bit slim but looks fit at least. He gives the camera a smile trying to not seem afraid. Definitely could be an ally. I watch him carefully.

"What is running through your head Cavallo?" One of the mentors asks.

"He seems like he would be a good ally." I admit honestly and look to see her reaction. She nods in approval and I smile, then again I haven't even seen Eleven and Twelve.

Then out of my moment of joy at the fact I am beginning to see a possible ally for the Games just one name shattered it all.

"Rosie-Anne Hernandez!"

No it must be someone else, it has to be someone that just so happens has her name. My heart drops as I see the small girl be given away by her very peers as they all step away as if she might infect them with her unfortunate luck. This can't be happening. How is this even possible? I always wanted a chance to see her again after so long but not like this.

She looks around at all the eyes bearing into her small body before collapsing to the dirt ground in tears. My heart lurches as I stare with an open mouth at the screen. Peacekeepers move forwards and pick her up by her arms and drag her to the scream. Everyone is silent.

First I was reaped, and now I am going into the Games with my half-sister. My mother had gone through a nasty divorce with my father and after it all she wanted nothing to do with my father. Even if it meant never seeing me again and taking Rosie with her. I didn't even know it was possible to change Districts. And she sure did have a hard time making it happen. She pretty much lied her way through saying she didn't feel safe here. She didn't throw my father or I under the bus but she did somehow manage to get herself to the closest District, Nine. That was a while ago but I can see it even in this much older looking Rosie that she is my sister and she is just being dragged like an animal up to the stage.

"Are you alright?" The escort questions me.

I turn to see them all staring at me. I shake the look of my face and nod. "I just hate seeing twelve year-olds be reaped. So unfortunate."

"She could still have a chance, I mean Siva did last year." The male mentor says.

The escort pipes in with another comment. "And at least there is only one twelve year old so far. Remember two years ago when there was about five twelve and thirteen year-olds? And last year two. Only one so far this year." She says nodding like she didn't just repeat things I already knew.

"Yeah," I say and look back to the screen to watch the District Ten Reapings. I have already seen it all though, it is interesting to see me walk to the stage though. To see me on screen. It is strange and doesn't even feel real. I manage to see my girlfriend's reaction this time. She seems so sad.

For District Eleven a girl in a wheelchair is reaped which just makes me cringe in sorrow. She shouldn't have even been eligible to be reaped. The boy is an older tribute and seems more like he could have a chance. He also seems to sympathize the girl so hopefully he can help her just the slightest. He seems like he could be an ally also. Though I still can't get over Rosie being reaped. Her teary face just has glued itself into my brain.

Twelve has a rather depressed looking girl who probably won't last too long; she could end up just like Jasmine from last year. Or I guess she could surprise us all. As long as she doesn't kill me I could care less, or Rosie I guess now.

Then a boy is reaped, he doesn't seem hopeless yet at the same time I can't imagine being his ally.

As the Reapings are over it changes to Cesar's face with the new Gamemaker and they start discussing things. We live it on but I don't want to watch another second. I get up and turn to them all.

"I think I am going to go to bed now." I say as sullen as I get.

The escort nods, "We will be at the Capitol probably by breakfast." She says and I just give a nod back before leaving them there to go find where I will be sleeping for the night.

* * *

_District Seven_

_Mason Excavase, 16_

I nestle myself in my spot on the couch right next to Lily feeling a bit better with food in me. My head is a bit dizzy from the whole fainting incident and just the fact I had hit my head on the ground when I blacked-out. The most damage done it seems is I have already made a mockery of myself from the second I even was reaped.

Great.

I don't really know what made it so bad I passed out. Was it because June had died before, my best friend besides Lily? Or was it that fact that waiting on that stage was my sister.

Both I guess, it was just too much. Lily isn't just my sister she is my twin. We are best friends and she was really one of the most important people in my life as we both grieved June's death. And now it is knowing the fact that at least one of us will be dead soon is just too heavy to take. Even now it makes me just want to blackout and disappear to anywhere but here.

"You okay?" Lily asks putting as much emotion as she had this whole time into her voice. I nod. She gives me a pitiful smile and gives me a tight hug holding herself there as we watch the Reapings.

As each District flashes by I feel myself grow sadder and sadder with each moment only momentarily recognizing the rage I had found with June's death so long ago reaching more and more to my blood threatening to spread throughout me in a fit of rage.

But like always I just push it back down. I always have, Lily was always the more outspoken person that always had something to prove and something to say. I guess I was always okay with fading into the background. I never minded.

When District Seven comes along I have to witness my fainting incident and get to see the reaction to all of it for myself. Lily had described some of it but she wasn't really at the right state of mind at the time to get a solid idea of what had happened. I see a pained look in her face and even see June's little sister Willow cry out. It surprises me but I assume she just sees us and is reminded of her sister. Lily told me she had come to her goodbyes, but she didn't tell me what she said. I guess there will be time for that later.

When the Reapings have wrapped up I find myself just wanting to get out of here.

"Well that's a wrap." The female mentor Avlida says clapping her hands together. She looks a lot sadder than she did a few years ago. She is a newer Victor and her heart is still getting use to this all. "Tomorrow is the Capitol." She says getting up and Lily stands up stretching.

"Night," she says and I nod in a goodbye also following her down the hall where are adjacent rooms are. Lily turns to me. "Can we talk?" She asks me.

"Of course," I say. I have wanted to have a private conversation with her ever since I came to. She opens the door to her room and I perch myself down onto the chair running my fingers through my hair letting out my stress.

"This can't be happening." I manage.

For once Lily is quiet. "Me neither."

It is silent for a few moments before she speaks once more. "I use to always beg Grandma to tell me how her and Grandpa met. I must have heard the stories so many times I would nearly have every word she would describe memorized. I could probably tell it as well as she could. I know you were always really close to dad though."

"He brought me up into the world of the lumberjacks." I say with a shrug. "I guess some people never really expect me to worry so much about being the next generation of all that just because I haven't always been the tallest, but dad always believed in me." I say with a small smile that we both share. The small glow from fond memories of our family calms me down. It makes me feel better even and not worry so much of the unfairness of this all.

"You aren't that short." She points out.

"I am shorter than a lot of those other boys." I say referring to the other tributes.

She nods, "that boy from Six is shorter than you."

I look up at her curiously. "He is fourteen of course he is." A smile manages to appear on her face. It is nice. I know we will have to come to term with some things but right now I just want to be cheered up.

"Five seven isn't that bad." Lily concludes and I nod. "Besides I am much shorter."

"That isn't so bad for females, besides it always worked to your advantage. Also hiding in places and such." I was about to say it will be a good tactic for her but I decide to avoid that sort of talk for now.

"Willow wanted us to avenge June you know." Lily says suddenly.

"Avenge?" I ask.

She nods, "She said she just wants us to do what June couldn't. You know how harsh getting of June's death has been for her."

"It has been for us all."

And with that we are in a thoughtful silence. June and I dated for a bit before we decided it wasn't in our best interest, but I always did love her, even if it wasn't in that sort of way. I always thought her to be beautiful. She was memorable to all of her family, she stood for something. And in her last moments what she said still echoes through my thoughts.

Lily will be memorable too, it pains me to even think of her as cold and dead but if she does die her death will take as much hit to my family and June's family as June did. Even the District. What about me though? I have never really stood for much. Not that I didn't have an opinion I just never said it much.

For the first time I am beginning to realize just how critical is might be for once to do the very thing I always avoided. I am most likely dead within two weeks. I don't want to be just some tribute that died; I don't want to be Lily's twin. Well I love being her twin I just don't want to go down as that.

I don't want to just fade away.

For the first time in my life I think I am going to just for once, speak out. And if I don't I will surely just become a blur.

And that scares me.

* * *

A/N- I am so sorry guys for the delay. I know it is only the fifth chapter but everything was just unfortunate. Sunday I literally studied the entire day for this stupid Math test, I literally have never studied more in my life. Then Monday I took the test and well my grade wasn't very good… I was devastated and to be honest I just sort of stomped around Monday. Definitely not writing mood. I am sure you guys can understand that.

Tuesday was so hectic and busy just because as many of you can understand EOCs are coming up and I have been trying to study while trying not to fail this last quarter.

Wednesday was actually my Birthday so I went out for dinner and all, I get home at four and I left at Five and got home at Eight and just had time to do homework. Nothing I could really do about that.

Thursday and Friday I have to really apologize for because I was trying so hard to write but rain season has started where I live and I guess the weather had me in some sort of funk because I just could not write. It was weird and I apologize.

Saturday I spent a lot of time writing but I had a concert to go to from four and didn't get home to midnight… not even joking T-T It was an hour away and we were waiting in line for an hour!

So yes I know this looks bad but please stick with me guys! I have big plans and I am still extremely excited about this story. Unfortunately things are just hectic BUT I have about four weeks left of school. (My school year ends the sixth) and then I have nothing to do so I can update a ton more! So please just stick with me until school ends.

And plus though updates aren't as often lately these chapters are freakishly long… I mean already on word document this story is sixty-one pages long!


	6. Chapter 6 Train Rides Pt 2

_**Chapter Six: Train Rides Part Two**__  
__**District Twelve**__  
__**Ash Kelley, 17**_

_The soft chirpings of birds is all I can hear. I stare ahead at the shimmering lake as I pull my knees closer to me with my arms wrapped tightly around them until the fill numb. My legs are so skinny, my arms so fragile. I am all skin and bones. Starved. I look down into my reflection in the water, I barely look human. I look like a monster. He still manages to love me though. I know that. He tells me so often, mostly when he is apologizing. How can he love me though? I never did understand why he loved me, I just know he does._

_ I look up at the sun that shines far too brightly for my eyes that are so sensitive to all this light. He is at work so I am here._

_ When I was younger my mother taught me how to tell time from the position of the sun, after all there isn't many clocks around here. We tell our time mostly from the sounds they use to alert us when the miners should get to work and when they are done working. Most of the people around here are fine with that, the people who rely on time mostly are just Peacekeepers anyway. But it mattered to me. So my mother taught me to keep me quiet. _

_ It seems I am drawing it close this time, but I don't care. The Reaping is tomorrow anyway, I could be Reaped. What do I have to loose?_

It was just a day ago really, but it feels ages ago. How ironic for me to end up being Reaped after all those grim thoughts of just that. The thing is, I just don't care too much about it. I have been reaped. Who cares? I guess I will miss Luke, he was so strange during my Goodbyes. But my parents are dead and I look just about dead too, the idea of being actually dead doesn't really bother me.

The escort glances up nervously at me ever so often. Effie is her name or something, why should I care? She is a newer escort anyway and already she has made it obvious she wants to get the hell out of twelve. Well she won't be going anywhere for a long time anyway. Twelve never wins. I won't win, I am just going to accept it.

Still I hate the stares she gives me. How she keeps trying to push more and more food upon me yet gets frustrated when I start eating it saying I eat like an animal. I must admit the food is great, maybe I will actually gain enough weight to look like an actual living human being and not some hollowed out shell of a seventeen year-old.

Everest is in a near opposite world it seems, he glances at me once and a while giving me a charming smile but I can see in his eyes he finds me to be frightening. My appearance is a bit unnerving. Hollowed out cheeks and silvery gray eyes that I hate to even match glances with in the mirror afraid they will reflect just horror, and of course black hair that has no volume or life to it. Luke has told me this before, it hurt a bit. He was supposed to love me, but I got over it. He loves me; he just has a strange way of showing it.

The thing strangest about Everest is that even though our hair color, skin color, and eye color are all so similar we don't even look like we are in the same species. He might go far, farther than me at least. But in the end he will die. They always do.

Taking another large bit of food I feel my stomach get more and more full of all the food this place has to offer. I am like a vacuum, sucking all of it in.

"Do you two want to watch the Reapings now?" Effie says with an unsure smile that just shows how little she knows what to do with us.

"Of course," Everest says with a smile.

"Not really," I say at the same time and Effie's smile falls. Haymitch, our only mentor, chokes out a drunken laugh.

"Well aren't you a fighter!" He spits sarcastically.

"I am just accepting my fate, I have no chance, and besides why would I want to just end up like you?" I say staring right at him, I don't know where that last part came from. Maybe a slight bit of anger I have had towards Luke is seeping out. After all I can't express it towards Luke, he would just hit me. He always does. My entire body is bruised. In some parts where everyone can see. But I wear a long sleeved coat over my long old dress. The only one these people can see is the one of my neck. And that isn't enough to figure out my past.

Like I said, he has a unique way of expressing his love. But he does. I know he does. When my parents had died he took me into his home, at first he apologized and sometimes he still does, he usually just tells me he loves me though. He locks me away, he is right to do so. He doesn't think the world would understand. He thinks they will take me away if they see my bruises. I only leave when he is at work, and only go to the meadow. I am so careful no one sees me.

I think that is why at my goodbyes he seemed sort of nervous, he is afraid people will figure it out.

"Excuse me?' Haymitch says in the silence, he drunk slurred words are enough to pull me from my thoughts. I have never really been around a drunk person. Luke would drink once and a while but never to the point he was like this, and I never saw anyone else. Just him and the people I see once a year at the Reapings.

I am silent and Effie lets out a little laugh. "Lets all go to watch the Reapings now!" She tries to calm us all down. Poor Everest just tries to move himself away from us. Luke would call him a wimp; it makes me miss him a little thinking about him. My body itches for him, for him to be here.

"Don't expect me to help you out in that Arena when you are being torn to pieces." Haymitch says to me. As if I am supposed to take that to heart, I have heard worse. Luke can be harsh.

"I don't expect any help from you, don't you listen? I don't expect to get out of this alive." I say and get up taking a large swig of my water before starting away. Effie grabs ahold of my jacket; she must be frustrated by my attitude. After all our success means her promotion.

"Come on just watch the Reapings with us." She says with that sparkly smile of hers. I try to move away from her but she has a tight grasp on my jacket and the sleeve of my jacket slips from my shoulder and exposes my bruises. The fresh ones a purple tint and the old ones a sickly green shade. Effie lets go of my sleeve looking rather uncomfortable.

I turn around to look at them; it was only a matter of time I guess. Everest looks shocked, even Haymitch in his drunken stage has some shock. They all look so uncomfortable.

"Did your parents do this to you?" Everest asks suddenly with sympathetic eyes.

"My parents are dead." I say before pulling my sleeve back up and walking away. Luke was right, they wouldn't understand. No one would understand.

* * *

District One

Burgundy Platt, 17

"So lets talk strategy." Patrick says with a smile that doesn't seem as energetic as I have remembered him having last year. He still seems to be okay I guess, Ann too. I don't know how they have manage to stay away from drugs and alcohol of sorts like most Victors, after all Patrick was the one who got to live instead of Ann's sister.

If I win I want to end up like that. But I guess I have a long road ahead of me before that.

Ecstasy next to me takes a deep breath scratching her arm once before taking a long jug of water as if she was substituting it for something. She looks like she could be pretty once her stylist clean her up it is just she is so frail looking, her hollowed out cheeks and narrow frame.

"Hey," she says to me catching me looking at her and I give a simple nod. I must look pretty dull to her; I must look pretty dull to everyone here. But that is all right. I have never really minded that all too much. The thing is, in many ways I am dull. I just don't really care about that much. Never really forced the idea of friends into my life, my only friend a girl who had pretty much forced herself into my life. At first it was bothersome, but over the years her presence has become a regular thing I can handle with ease. Maybe I even had come to enjoy her hanging around me constantly in a strange way.

Then she had to drop the news on me in my goodbyes, which can cause a little bit of stress in me. It is almost as if from it a small spark of something other than something so sure that this is the right thing to do, something made me wonder if I will miss her if I die.

_Dammit Merlot, _I think before eating another piece of chicken.

"Guys?" I hear Ann ask. Looking up I see the two of them staring at us, oh right strategy

"Any suggestions?" I ask putting my fork neatly back onto my plate.

"Well first thing is how you will want people to see you as." Ann says obviously taking on the more mature and professional role as Patrick pushed his food around on his plate; he is nineteen now I think.

"How should we be wanting people to see us?" Ecstasy acts her straight face stubbornly sticking to her.

"It matters," Ann says before looking at us both seriously. "You are both going to be Careers right?" She asks and we both nod and she looks a tad more relieved at that.

I am not really fame hungry, power hungry, or an idiot. At least I hope I am not. I don't see myself to be psycho though. I just like wounds. Not giving them, just watching them and looking at them. I find them fascinating like a strange sort of energy that surges through me with the idea of it healing and the skin repairing. So I guess that is how I have ended up here and though I could care less with alliance I suppose if everyone so badly wants me to be a career I might as well be one.

"OK then, we obviously go into more detail later on before your interviews but one thing I do suggest is getting Sponsor's attention. Make them notice you." Ann says and looks us both over. No disappointed- unsure. Unsure what to do with us. She looks to me. "You could come off as strong and powerful. We will have them keep that scar of yours, it is mysterious and intimidating." Ann says.

I shrug.

She takes a deep breath before looking to Ecstasy. She has more trouble with her, any of your average career strategies really don't seem to be fit to her. "You could be mysterious too, and maybe even charming if you can move a crowd." Ann says.

"I rather be mysterious." She says in negative reference to the charming suggestion.

"That will work fine, if you can manage a good training score. My suggestion is to also come off as intelligent." Patrick pitches in suddenly.

Ecstasy nods.

Ann smiles nervously, the girl seems ready to explode with anxiety. "Great now that we have that done we can move on okay?" She asks and the rest of us just give tired nods.

* * *

I run my fingers over the blue pendant as I lay the cool metal of the necklace over my palm. It wasn't meant to come with me; I just didn't feel like removing it. I guess now it might as well come into the Arena with me. It doesn't really matter really. I never really cared about useless things like that, too much attachment.

I rarely understand much about people, though I never understand why. I never understood attachment, which is why it feels strange to feel these strange emotions with just the slightest nagging feeling of missing Merlot if I were to die. I sigh in frustration and rub my temples. Being friends with people never mattered, but now I sort of regret it. It wasn't like I made her feel comfortable to be around me, I just never tried too hard to push her away. Then when she confronted me with her emotions I did nothing- I didn't know what to say. I felt uncomfortable, that is it.

I take the necklace and put it back around my neck and hear a knock on the door. I sit up and turn around. I want to be alone. I need this moment.

"Come in," I say. It doesn't really matter I guess. I never care about things, besides whoever it is they should be out as soon as they realize how useless what I have to say is. Which should be quick. Merlot was the only one who saw past how dull I seemed to everyone else. She saw through that cloak, she probably saw into my more unsettling side. The one I still haven't understand yet.

"Hey," It is Ecstasy. She stands with a friendly smile at the door. I don't understand this. Someone else would be I am just confused at her appearance. "I just wanted to talk. I am kind of nervous and you are going to be in the alliance after all." She says nervously.

She doesn't like me, she isn't making a move on me. That is what I know. I don't know what else to gather from this. She is nervous, just not in that way. Then again I would have said that about Merlot too.

"Sure what do you want to talk about?" I ask, I just need to keep talking. Tell her what she wants to hear.

"Why did you volunteer?" She asks sitting down on the bed next to me.

Because I wanted to see the blood, I wanted to see the wounds. Because it gives me life. Why else?

"I have trained for so long I figured, why not?" I respond. "What about you?" I won't have to worry if she will take this too close to heart and think we are friends. After all she will be dead soon enough.

"I wanted some meaning." She says with a nod. "The careers are a large alliance. It would be nice to have at least one person to be friends with after all, well not friends but you know someone to trust, I know only one can win but if we make a deal then I guess at final eight we can go back and all." She says.

She can't possibly trust me this easily, there is something more to this I know it. And to be honest I don't really mind. I don't care if she is around or not.

"Sure," I say with a small shrug wondering more about what she meant when she said she wanted some "meaning." It is obvious now she must have been addicted to something.

She nods, "cool." Then she gets up from the bed. "I will leave you to sleep now before we reach the Capitol." She says and I nod. She smiles before turning around and heading back out the door. I listen as the door opens across the hall and shuts once more. I get up and shut my own door and then go back to my own bed and collapse in it. Alone.

* * *

District Four

Monica Davenport, 18

I twirl a strand of hair impatiently as I wait for Ummi to get to the right channel. Heavens know why she is the one that is doing it; she doesn't seem sane enough to know how to eat let alone this.

I guess I am sort of stressed, which just makes me more stressed. I can't get stressed, it does all sort of damage. I mean forget the dark circles and wrinkles it can cause, this isn't a joke anymore. All of this is real now. I won't get to try again or whatever. I need to keep my mental level at its highest level if I want my time in the Capitol and Arena to be as easy as possible. I am not too worried though, if Sedna could make it to the showdown last year I will become a Victor in no time. It is in my blood.

I stretch out my legs and fix my golden hair. I glance towards Caleb. My District partner. I have to say I might be actually happy Sedna volunteered last year instead of me. Sure that bitch stole my spotlight but she ended up dead and now I get to be allies with a hopefully single hot guy. It works out well really, I will win and Sedna is dead. Plus instead of some father and mayor's son I have Caleb. I smile in his direction, nothing too serious but it can't hurt to flirt can it? Caleb glances at me out of the corner of his eyes.

"What?" He asks me as Ummi still flips through channel by channel.

"Just enjoying the view." I say winking before glancing back to the TV screen continuing to twirl my hair. He doesn't respond, good I want him to be speechless.

I see an Avox come by to take away our dirty plates from dinner. I snap my fingers glancing at her. "Um can you get me something to drink, possibly something sweet. Nothing alcoholic though I need to be in top shape mentally as well as physically." I say with a smile. She glances around confused looking.

"Monica she is clearing the table." The Escort says.

"So?" I ask confused, isn't that what they are here for? I mean that is what my maid at home is for. My dad is a Victor, so naturally any sort of luxury I want is not far away. I look back to Caleb, he looks rich enough. Not rich like me but not some idiot fisherman's kid. Because as shown from last year that just doesn't work. He looks sort of familiar, probably from school. Or something, I just feel like I know something about him. But what?

I am sure I will remember it eventually, and if it is something bad then well that is just one more thing I will use to have him all wrapped up. Until then I will just have to depend on what I currently have in the works. He looks to me again; this time doesn't say a word. I smirk as I hear finally the familiar voice of Caesar. Of course since Ummi doesn't even know how to work a TV because she is messed up in the head or something it is already to District Five. Just great, I was looking forward to seeing how my Reaping turned out to look. Some twelve year old is reaped, our thirteen who cares. She is young enough that she doesn't stand much of a chance.

The only reason a twelve year old got far last time is because some fourteen year-old boy was way too tall and mature for his age protected her. She got lucky. Then a kid volunteers, really creepy looking. Dark hair that just doesn't fit for Five, but in a way it defines him. Creep.

District Six has a sort of strong looking girl I guess, she is pretty so maybe that could help. But she is a little offsetting and probably shares a one-room house with all ten family members of hers so I don't even bother to consider her as a possible Career.

The male tribute is another younger tribute who apparently never heard that sleep loss causes dark circles. I mean honestly does he know how to sleep? Definitely not Career material. Not like Caleb and I.

District Seven has siblings or cousin or whatever, either way they know each other and the boy has a total freak out. Whatever they won't get my sympathy. They both are sort of short and I might have considered the girl if she didn't present herself so strangely.

District Eight has some girl with hair that really could use a trim. For a District that should have all sorts of scissors for cutting fabrics and all she doesn't seem to have access to them. So not a Career.

Then the boy is just a plan old freak. Why are there so many freaks this year? Seriously if I knew there would be about zero competition this year I would have gotten over Sedna stealing my spotlight much earlier.

District Nine has once again some twelve year-old kid, she has a exotic look to her. It is sort of cool I admit, but she is just another bloodbath in my eyes. What a pity and what not, not like I had her reaped anyway.

The boy is handsome, always a plus, and seems pretty well built. Sort of mischievous looking but that could be good. I glance to Caleb. "Possible addition to the alliance?" I ask. He shrugs not seeming to care too much.

Ten has another ethnic looking boy with a similar last name, but it is like it has an added name to it or something. Weird. The boy is pretty hot I guess, not my type though. The girl is strong looking actually, not gorgeous just sort of plan. She reminds me of someone. Whatever. She could be a contender but she seems too free-spirited or whatever people say which makes her probably one of those tributes that wouldn't dare join the Careers. Because apparently they don't like surviving.

I don't pay much attention to Ten and Twelve since even if they were good enough to join the Careers they wouldn't anyway, it isn't "moral" to them.

Finally the Avox comes back with my drink and I give her a quick smile before taking it. Too late now, but I guess I can enjoy it before I have to go to sleep. It isn't good to drink too much before bed, doesn't do the body good, but for this one time I will let it slip. After all this is the start of something beautiful. The start of the rest of my life. And it is wonderful.

It makes me forget the nightmare I had in the small amount of sleep I had last night. It makes me forget that inside I don't think Caleb even flinched at my flirting. I just relax myself with the wonderful escape into paradise I take with the drink the Avox finally managed to bring me. It reminds me of something my father brought home for me from the Capitol and that makes me smile too. I am going to be in the Capitol soon. My heart flutters.

As everyone gets up to go to bed I hear some talking but ignore it and walk to the window. It is all a blur as we moved at warp speed but I can see lights in the distance. It probable isn't the Capitol, most likely District Two or One. Maybe even Three. I don't care though; I let myself believe it is the Capitol.

This is the start of something amazing. I can feel it, the other tributes don't have a clue what they have coming for them.

* * *

District Nine

Rosie-Anne Herandez, 12

_"Mommy where are we going?" I ask as my heart pounds away and I fear mother will hear my heart and know how scared I am. I don't want her to worry about me. I just want to understand. I am confused and it is making me scared. What about Cavallo and Daddy?_

_ "We are going somewhere new Rosie, we will have a fresh start." My mother tells me bending down from a moment after pausing from her fast walking and looks me in the eyes. "Please trust me, everything will be okay." She tells me with a nervous smile. She wants me to feel comforted at this but I can see in her eyes her stress._

_ I don't want her to be feared, I want her to smile. She hasn't smile much since Daddy and her separated. They were arguing a lot before then anyway. Now mommy is pulling me along with a suitcase in her hand and my own bag over my shoulders. _

_ We continue on through the street of my home. Living in District Ten there are lots of sunshine and beautiful scenery. I don't want to leave it, and while I haven't heard of anyone moving away from his or her District I fear that is just what mommy intends to do. _

_ I want my brother here; I want Cavallo to be here once again. I miss him and it makes me sad knowing he isn't going to come with us. Why is mommy taking me away?_

_ We reach the Justice Building, the very place I see every morning before going to school. Mommy stops me at the entrance looking very nervously. "You wait in the entrance near the nice lady at the front desk. Don't move I will be back soon." She says before opening the door and ushering me in. Then she points to a chair and tells me to seat. I seat down as she leaves me all alone with her bag and starts talking to the lady. I can't really understand much what they are saying but I know my suspicions we are leaving are only growing. _

_ I don't want to leave. This place is my home._

That was such a long time ago; somehow my mother did the impossible. She got us out of Ten and since then so much happened I had no choice but to forget Cavallo, now by some sort of horror beyond me I will get to see him again. In the Arena as a tribute. That is the definition of tragic. Especially since I am just twelve, it is like they finally took something from my mother. As if letting her and I move too Nine was too nice and we had to pay.

The Reapings finish up and I just want to fall into a deep sleep, I guess a much more shallow part of me is happy I will have someone to protect me and be my ally. That is if he even cares for me anymore. I could just be his half-sister that disappeared. We aren't even full siblings, just half. But he stayed with my father and I left with my mother. The only reason my mother could even leave with me was because my dad already had Cavallo, who was his son he had before he met my mother.

My mom feel in love again and I have a little sister Suzanna now but soon afterwards my stepfather died of cancer, nothing seemed to go right in my life. I must imagine Cavallo has to feel the same way. I can't wait to see him.

It will be nice to see him before I die since I can't win. He can though. I will do all I can to help him for that. It is a strange decision and it makes my hand shake but I want at least one of us to get out alive. And it won't be me.

No, I don't want to die young. I so badly don't want to die so young. I want to cry but not in front of the others.

"I am going to go to bed." I say getting up quickly, shaking. They all glance at me surprised at the sudden notion before I turn on my heels and speed out of the room and try to find my room. The Escort told me where it was earlier during dinner. This place is luxurious but it is still a train and isn't too big so I find it with ease. I rip the door open and close it once again sinking down to the ground. I want to cry. I can feel the tears. But I just sit there with a wretched look on my face. I can see my reflection in a mirror. My tan skin somehow manages to look sickly pale. I am just some baby; I still have baby fat in my cheeks. I am skinny because while I don't starve I never have too much to eat. My family is poor like everyone in Nine is, but my face still manages the fat.

I like to plant flowers. I am happy and outgoing. I am cheerful. I strive for recognition. I am not this, I am those things but not this scared little girl. Well I guess I got the attention I wanted. Letting out a deep breath to release some stress I pick myself back up before I hear a knocking on the door. I figured someone would come; I did have sort of a hasty exit there. The question is who.

"Rosie-Anne?" Micah, I guess he is the only one who hasn't sat through hopeless tributes year after year. I open the door sullenly.

"People call me Rosie." I tell him looking up. He is so much taller than me, so much bigger than me. He is full of hope of survival, maybe even as much as Cavallo.

"Well what about Anne? I don't think it gets the attention it deserves. You know I think I will call you Anne." He proclaims. I don't think it is worth arguing. I always preferred Rosie but for some reason I don't mind.

"Okay," I say. "They aren't going to make it painful are they?" I ask suddenly looking to the ground.

"Make what painful?" He asks.

"The deaths, I don't want all those people to die painfully. I don't want that either." I tell him. I don't often watch the Games. My mother doesn't allow it. I know some of course, and some other stuff from what people talk about.

"I can't make any promises." He says uneasily, I think I am making him uncomfortable. "But you are just a kid, they probably will go easy on you."

"Really?" I say, it does add some hope to me. I know that it just means they will be less brutal with my death but it is a positive right?

He looks away as he nods. "I just wanted to check up on you quickly, you sort of freaked us out back there." He tells me.

I frown, should I tell him about Cavallo?

No.

"This is all just a lot to process."

He nods in agreement. "Of course, I am right with you on that one. It still doesn't feel like I have even left yet. My mind is just stuck back at Nine."

I nod sympathetically as we stand in silence for a few moments until it grows awkward and Micah speaks to fill the silence. "Till morning Anne." He says giving one nod before escaping into the hallway to go to his room.

"Bye," I whisper as he disappears and I escape back into my room. I feel calmer now, and he is still a stranger to me basically. In a strange way it relaxes me because I know everything will be easier once Cavallo is with me. I will have my big brother.

* * *

District Eleven  
Akua Scintillant, 15

I hear a knocking on my door, it pulls me from the peaceful darkness of my dreams. It feels seconds ago I was watching the Reapings. Watching all the children that will die by my side. It is a strange thought knowing you are going to die, I mean I am in no way ready to give up… I am just hoping for one chance.

A small little dreams floods through me; people would feel bad for me. They will help me. They will Sponsor me. I don't like using my disability like that but it could be my biggest chance of survival.

I guess you can say I have always have had the tendency to be optimistic, which is why even the realistic thoughts of my grim demise upset me. I am keeping myself sane by not giving up. I can't give up of course, even if I don't get past that metal plate. I have a life back in Eleven; not glamorous but it is still there. I was lucky enough to even get a wheel chair. Most people would just be thrown into the gutter. I was given a second chance.

"Hello?" I hear the voice again and remember the knocking on the door. It is the male mentor.

"Yes?" I ask managing to get myself sitting. My wheelchair is beside my bed. I had help just getting into bed; this must be what he is here for. To help me. I had to have help back home but that was my family, these are strangers. They all must see me as a lost cause. Even if they don't let on. Harsh is so nice, despite his name, but he must know that I am hopeless. Especially in comparison to him. It has been a while since we have had a real male contender, it is nice to see one finally I guess.

"Can I come in?" He asks.

"Yeah," I respond back and he opens the door trying to seem happy.

"Thought you could use some help," He says.

"Yes, thank you." I say and he holds out his hand. He won't have trouble picking me up; he won for a reason after all. And it sure wasn't because he was all bone; the man is probably fifty percent muscle. Even now, years after he won.

I take his hand and he swiftly picks me up before placing me into my wheelchair. Finally, I can have some control now.

"We have arrived at the Capitol." He tells me and I nod.

"So this is the start huh?" I ask and he looks back at me.

"Yup, just smile and wave." He says and I smile in response. "Perfect," he says and opens the door for me. I see a tired looking Harsh emerge from his room with an annoyed looking escort already lecturing him for taking a while to answer he door. He ignores her nodding at me.

"Morning," Harsh says.

"Right back at you." I say and we head down the hall back to the eating area.

My first look at the Capitol, well at least in person. It is amazing. It is everything Eleven isn't. And everything they say Eleven can't be.

"Stunning," I say.

"Agreed, I can see why now they didn't have the budget to fix up Eleven." Harsh says sitting at the table where breakfast has already been laid out.

"Better get that all out now boy." The male mentor says as the escort nods too appalled to speak.

"Naturally," Harsh says.

I frown and wheel myself over to him. "Seriously Harsh you have a chance, don't waste that. Some of us aren't lucky enough to be at such an advantage." I say and look down to myself.

"You are an underdog, that doesn't mean you don't have a chance." Harsh tells me.

I nod not sure what to say so I just turn myself around so I can eat. The escort seats down in a very professional matter.

Back home I had three major friends. When I was a child I had a birth defect and a few days later my father died and passed on his money to us. That is how my mom afforded to manage my life and the fact I am paralyzed from the waist down. I never had to work and some of the other children got angry at that, but as long as I was still alive with my three best friends. I just worried about school and I excelled, my mother always read to me and I spend time with my friends.

My one friend Sanaa is the most incredible Artist, I would just watch on and on as she would draw and paint. Tapiwa is outgoing and fun and takes me on all her adventures, bringing me with her. Never growing impatient with the fact it was harder for me to go on our little adventures. Xolani is my guy friend, and sometimes I feel like we could be something more than that. He is serious and peaceful, always talking about the politics of the world. He dreams of being a doctor and has always been kind with me.

Sometimes I don't just imagine we could be something more but I hope for it, I can only believe he feels the same way. But that doesn't matter now, now I have to worry about keeping positive to try my hardest to get out of this alive.

"Eat it you two." The Escort encourages us.

"Don't need to tell me twice." I say with a cheery smile, it is easy to be happy as the sunlight shines through the train window reminding me of fond memories back in Eleven.

"You are so positive." Harsh whispers next to me, it isn't a question. It isn't an insult or a compliment. It is just a statement that we all let hang around as we eat our breakfasts in silence.

Finally as we reach closer to the Capitol the male mentor decides to begin to talk with strategy. "They are going to get you ready for your time here in the Capitol, and for your Chariot Rides. They will do things that make sting, that burn. But nothing that will kill you. Don't complain. Just do as told. Understand?"

We both nod.

"Good then," the escort says. "Are you two done?" She asks and we stumble over our answers but before we can even answer she waves her hand and an Avox takes away our plates. I was done eating anyway.

"Into position!" The Escort says and she gestures for us to get up, or follow her in my case. The train goes into the station where people dressed and decorated in all sorts of colors scream and yell for us.

We are in the Capitol.

It feels as if the timer has started ticking down our sixty seconds, but this is only one step of our brutal journey that we have ahead of us. This in way is the start of something I have feared for so long, now it is right in front of me.

And I face it like I face everything else, with a smile.

* * *

I am SO sorry guys T-T I feel awful I really do, I just have been majorly stress with all the tests, projects, and schoolwork being thrown at us right before the end of the school year. Whenever I planned to get writing done something would be thrown my way that would stop it. But still this isn't acceptable and for that I apologize greatly to you guys. I owe you a lot of chapters, and I intend to catch up.

But I come with good news, school is over :D Done. I am so happy I will have more time to write. School ended last Thursday for me and I WANTED to post this chapter over the weekend but NOPE I had to go on a trip, but it was somewhere not too far away so I brought my laptop will full 100% battery and got bored and the car ride and played a PC game, because I am an idiot and forgot it drains your battery like crazy. In three hours I had no battery, and no way to update the chapter.

So new schedule for posting chapters from now on up to the Games:

Monday, Wednesday, Friday.

So three a week :) And I am going to try my very hardest to stick to this schedule

Oh and I have a poll up that revolves around two of the Arenas. There will be Six and I have four picked and can't decide on the last two, so if I were you guys I would vote. Since your tributes will be going into the two Arenas that get the most votes.


	7. Chapter 7 Give this Thing a Shot

Unstoppable

District Three

Jean Adric, 16

I am tugged on my arm as I begin to panic by all the strange looking people surrounding me and chirping word by word until I can't handle it. I have always tried so hard to make friends and get people to talk to me and now I can't even handle it. I just mumble word-by-word replies to all their questions as my style team tugs me through a hallway where I can see the girl from District Two in a bathrobe. Our eyes connect and she just stares as me as I am pushed behind a curtain and it is closed tightly shut behind me with three people in the room.

They surround me closing in as the push me back to sit on a cold metal table. I look back and forth as the one in the middle with rainbow hair begins to talk again with instructions.

"We are going to clean you up before your stylist comes and gets you ready for the Chariots Ride." He says and then their hands push down on me so I lay down on the metal table. I can't even respond in time.

"Uhhh," I say feeling rather uncomfortable. Back home I have three people I would always bother. It wasn't exactly they were okay with that it is just I found them interesting so I would follow them around once and a while awkwardly talking.

"How could you do this to your arm!" I hear one of them say as they hold my arm harshly in the air looking at all the writings on my arm. I panic and pull my arm back. It is ideas for poems; things I wanted remembered. Fragments of thoughts and ideas. I wasn't so sure I wanted these strangers reading all these personal things.

"Please it is nothing just wash it off, no need to read." I stumble with. I like when people like my mother read and love my work but I guess I can just be shy about it, even though everyone back home knows me as the guy who writes poetry.

"Whatever you say," The woman who first discovered the writing on my arms says with a shrug before getting a sponge and pouring some strong smelling soap onto it and scrubbing it all over my arm turning the blue ink into smudges of blue. They start touching my skin making my skin tingle and one of them take out metal tweezers. Things people in Three use once and a while for moving small little machine and wires parts easily. Now I am the one being picked apart as she holds it close to my eye flinching as she presses the tips to the eyebrow puling little on one of the hairs and she yanks it back with a strong pinch. I gasp and she chuckles.

"They always do that." She says as the other woman and the man continue to scrub at my arm. All of the blue ink from my arm gone and the man standing back giving me a once over.

"Shirt needs to come off." He tells me flipping his colorful hair. I blush my cheeks a vibrant red. The other two backing off so I can sit up and remove my shirt. I tremble uncomfortably. I am awkward enough without being bare. "And your pants, you can keep your underwear on for now." He says again and I am speechless, is this really happening.

Yup it is, this is all happening.

Just great.

* * *

I shift in my costume. It is different I admit, but I feel like an idiot in it. There are various robot parts with my pale thin arms exposed but covered in paint to look like the inside of a machine. A halo around my hair flashes with bright colored lights. I am ushered down a hall unto I see Mae being pushed out of the room.

"Hey sweetie." She smirks sarcastically as we walk next to each other down the hallway before reaching a door.

"Hello," I say looking to the floor just hoping I don't say anything too stupid.

"This is it!" Someone says as they press their hands firmly on my back making me squirm. The door open all on its own and the loading station is revealed. It is stunning; it leaves me in an awe as I admire the room's pure beauty. I see twelve chariots each with stern looking horses ready to pull along their cargo. And I see people running around all of them desperate to put some organization into this chaos. Tributes fill the room all dressed up in eccentric costumes, I can barely recognize any of them. Everyone is cleaned up to the Capitol's liking.

I have to say, for such a destructive and disgusting event they sure do dress it up all nice and pretty.

"I want you to go and stay by your Chariot." My stylist orders Mae and I before letting go of my back and releasing me. I follow Mae trying my best to keep up, she has a fast pace strut as she walks with her nose in the air. She seems much less whiny than she did before. I guess she has gotten over being reaped.

"You doing okay?" I ask nervously as we reach the Chariot that is naturally dressed up in machine parts.

Mae shrugs, "Yeah I get through this week then I become Victor. It really isn't that difficult"

I am a little taken back I must admit, "Huh?" I mumble.

She turns to me with a plastic smile, "Oh don't worry Jean baby if I have to be the one to kill you I will make it painless and quick. But lets admit you don't honestly expect you will get far do you?" She says with a pitiful look.

My mouth is frozen in an O position as I stare speechless at her a few mumbled words coming from my mouth.

"Jean I would help you I would, but I am going to win and some bloodbath, mumbling, awkward idiot isn't going to get in my way." She gives another smile before spinning around and using her long legs to get herself up onto the Chariot.

I rarely dislike people, and I never hate people. But man I don't think I am going to like this girl. I lean against a giant cogwheel on the Chariot shaking my head before taking a deep breath and get past my anxiety.

"Waiting on you." Mae says twirling a strand of hair as I pick myself up to stand next to her on the Chariot.

* * *

District Six

Cara Meridius, 18

I pop my lips together to spread out the bright red lipstick. I look like a freak, District Six is so uncreative and as soon as they have a girl who is at least average looking and above fourteen they dress them up as a slutty nurses. They did it to Dawn two years ago and she was actually pretty. Me? I am not too unfortunate but I am not this. Neither is poor Elian,

He is dressed up as a patient which in my opinion is a little bit rude but I wasn't the one who made him look truly sickly. Of course he obviously comes from wealth so while his eyes were already dark and his under eye shadows well defined he still didn't have the thin hollowed out look. Well they gave it to him.

I sympathize him, I really do. That is why I will keep my distance as much as possible. When I have a black out I become a monster in human skin. I don't want to hurt him, he doesn't deserve whatever I would do if he had to be around me when I blackout.

"We should probably get on the Chariot now." I tell him and he just nods. I try my best to move in my skimpy nurse outfit. I feel so exposed. It is repulsive. What kind of nurse would work in an outfit like this? I can barely move my legs and when I do I have trouble trying to balance myself with these heels.

I am so going to be falling off this Chariot.

Elian gets onto his Chariot adjusting his hospital robe as I pull out the fake needle I will use to pretend to give him a shot. What a creative idea….

I see District One covered in glittering jewels reflect all sorts of beautiful colors as the try to pull off a good strong warrior look. District Two follows shortly after as I feel my heart skip a beat knowing soon enough we will be moving.

Three goes after and as soon as they leave the loading area their costume morph with the machine parts moving as if some sort of machine was being built on their bodies.

Four goes, then Five, and then soon enough I find Elian and I both instinctively grabbing each other's hand. I guess it will do the helpful nurse look good, even if it is just because I don't want to fall off.

I wish I could say we ate smiling as brightly as we and and wave and are putting on a good show for all the Capitol residents, but we didn't. I slumped over grasping on so tightly desperate not to fall off I just turned my head forward ignoring any cat calls people thrown my way. Elian just looks around with a sad looking face.

In a strange way, it fills me with a small amount of pride we aren't giving them what they want. Even if in the end it will just get us zero sponsors.

We come to a stop in the middle of the line of Chariots all in front of President Snow who stands at his podium looking down at us all.

"Let the 62nd Hunger Games Begin!"

XXXXX

I step off the Chariot with my bright red heels in hand. I don't even care if my feet get dirty I am tired of wearing these things.

Elian steps down besides me scratching his head before rubbing his hand across his face and smudging the makeup on his face.

I stretch my arms exhausted and just wanting to get to wherever I will have to be spending my time, get this junk off my face, and get to bed.

I turn around right away to feel a pair of eyes bearing into my skull. I spot two Chariots down the District Eight male staring at me with curiosity. Not in the way most of the other males do like they are harvesting me with their eyes, just curiosity.

"They don't look happy." Elian says from behind me as I break the stare with the boy and turn around to follow Elian's line of vision right to a very disappointed looking group of people.

"He was looking at you." Elian says.

I don't respond just glance to Elian who is staring up at me. Man his makeup really does make him look sick.

"You know you pulled the sick patient off well." I say.

"Thanks." He says before looking back to the ground. I don't want to go and get yelled at by our style team, but they are already making their way here.

"You just threw the opportunity I gave you two!" My stylist says looking ready to cry.

I feel myself get angry, does he honestly think this will give either of us any of the opportunities we wanted? This isn't me. I can't pull this off. I am that quiet girl everyone ignores that is just trying not to become a murderer.

"What opportunity?" I growl, I begin to count in my head. I can't freak out here. I can't.

"You acted so depressed and _weird. _You were supposed to act beautiful and happy." My stylist wins.

"Why would I be happy? And I want to look nice but I can't be the person you want to be. I am not some drop dead gorgeous girl who can put on a nice smile for the camera!" I yell back distraughtly.

"Then you are just going to give up?" He asks.

I am silent for a few moments before I speak. "No, I am going to try but I am doing it how I see fit, how my mentors see fit. Not what some dumb spoiled Capitol boy sees fit." I say before marching away.

I feel my heartbeat fasten; I am a mess, falling apart at the hinges.

I am collapsing.

* * *

District Eleven

Harsh Greene, 17

At home I had constant problems with fighting. I never back down, my mother told me I was always so defensive and one day it was going to get me killed. I love my mother, yet I never did listen to her advice to calm down. I guess I regret that now. Now that I am being all dressed up with makeup and bright colors. I'm wearing a cape. A _cape. Made out of plants! _It doesn't even go with the overall!Everything about this reeks of a bad nightmare that makes me want to explode.

God I have been Reaped to go into a fight to the death and what I am wearing is what worries me most right now. The full affect of what lies ahead just hasn't settled in yet, every survival instinct taking over to take me through this allowing my mind to wander and worry about my outfit instead.

I wear overalls, which I don't remember every having to wear out in the field by the way, and my face and body is painted with all sorts of bright greens to depict all of nature's beauty. I am sure the Capitol will like it if they spend the time to look at it, but we won't stand out. I just really hope Akua's covers up a bit more because if we are wearing the same thing then she is going to have a certain area exposed.

"I have a wonderful idea!" My stylist tells me as she ushers me along the hallway trying to hold my hand to guide me, only for each and every time to have me shake myself loose of her grasp. Thank god she is a woman, I try not to be sexist but I just get less angry with woman than I do at man. Well at least I have not as short of a temper around them. Besides she thinks the fact I am half black is unique, and cool. Better than her judging me negatively for it I guess.

"What would that be?" I mumble not as excited as she probably was expecting.

"Well since Akua can't stand on her own in the Chariot…." I forgot about that, I didn't even think how she was going to manage that. Will I have to keep her wheelchair from falling out of the Chariot or something? "You are going to be holding her up! I mean you are strong and you might have difficulty but a strong tribute like you will pull through."

It might help with Sponsors… besides if it helps Akua then I don't care if it will be hard. It will make us get noticed and turn her disability into strength for just a short time. I nod in agreement, "Sounds fine." I reply and her coral red lips extend even further into a freaky serial killer smile.

"Oh perfect!" She jumps up clapping her hands before ripping my arm from my side making sure to grab the gloves so she doesn't smudge the paint on my arms and drags me along. I let out a sigh and just let the Capitol woman drag me along.

Everything moves in a fast paced blur like someone is skipping along until I find myself facing Akua ready to get out of her wheelchair and into my arms so we can get onto our Chariot. I already see District One on the move. I feel the pressure on as she reaches her arms to wrap around my neck and I can feel her tense up.

"I am sorry if this is awkward, I know this is a difficult situation but I don't want to be your enemy and I don't want you uncomfortable." I tell her and I can already feel her relax a little. I pick up her legs trying not to smudge any of the paint. But it has dried by now. She wears overalls like I do but hers are a little shorter, where mine go to my legs hers end a little higher. And she has a skinny piece of fabric to cover up her chest.

She manages a bright smile, she is so positive. I love it. Not in a creepy way of course, I can't imagine it that way.

I want her to be my ally.

I make that realization as I try to secure her in my arms and step onto the Chariot and grasp onto the front of the chariot with one hand balancing her on the upper part of my arm and hold onto her back with my other arm.

We begin to pull out from the Loading Area and I can hear the screams of the crowd outside. "Do you want to be allies?" I say suddenly as the surge of being in all of the cheering rushes over us.

"Huh?" She asks confused.

"Do you want to be my ally?" I ask as we enter the lane down to where I know the President is waiting for us all to arrive.

"Sure!" She says before putting on a smile her arms locked around my neck to secure herself from falling. I put on a strong face. I want to look tough. I raise my head above midpoint and stare ahead as I try my best to look confident as I hold Akua as she gets confident enough to release one hand to wave to the crowds. She catches a rose thrown her way handing it to me to hold in my teeth. I keep it there a thorn poking into my lip but I keep it there. The crowd seems to love it and that is all that matters.

They don't hate us.

I sure do hate them, but as much as I hate everything they stand for I want to help Akua for the sake of helping the underdog and because she is still so damn positive. But most of all I want to go down with a fight if I can't win, I refuse to give up.

I am going to give this all I got.

* * *

District Nine

Micah, 17

"Everything will be okay Rosie, you don't have to worry." I tell her as I place my hand on her shoulder as I see her nervously glancing back at the District behind us. She snaps back into focus playing with the bottom of her scarecrow looking dress. We both are dressed as scarecrows. It isn't too bad but I feel stupid with a black dot on my nose and straw coming out of the top of my shirt.

"Yeah you are right." She says with a smile. "I was just worried I would fall off." She says as she glancing to the ground that the Chariot has put us from a distance from.

She is naïve, even if she doesn't seem to naïve about her winning this thing she sure is about other things. It should stay that way. I just really doubt that will happen. I shake the thought- I have other things to worry about.

I am not an ass, I just realize that as much as I do to help this kid there is so little I can really do. That makes me sad but in a way it is just something I need to use to prepare myself for the much worse things that are ahead.

I smile. I need to smile. I am a happy person. I do stunts are joke around constantly for attention, I do things look jump from roof to roofs as my peers cheer me. Now I am going to be killing my peers. And my peers are going to want to kill me.

Stunts are my things, I have always just loved preforming some risky act that makes everyone cheer and makes my heart rush. They love it. Maybe the Capitol will love it too. I just need to think of something to do.

I see District Eight be tugged out of the Loading Dock. They are dressed as factory workers I believe. Seven in front of them are dressed as tress… very original.

I feel the Chariot begin to move from under us and try to get a good feel of it under my feet as I put on my trademark goofy smile and think of what I can do. People call say I am a "pretty boy" but to be frank that always sounds so stupid to me. Especially since Micah can also be a girl's name too. As we enter the sight of all the Capitol Citizens I try to gently grab Rosie's hand and thrust our hands into the air and at first she is surprised but soon she starts laughing a little bit. By then I let go and risk jumping up stretching out my arms to the sky. I land back down too close to the end for my liking and move back to the front of the Chariot and once I regain comfort again I put one foot on the top of it.

I swear to god if I die before the Games even start…

No I have done this kind of thing before, this is what I do all the time. I can do this. This is what makes people idolize me while call me a complete idiot for putting myself out there so much. I lift myself up onto the edge of the Chariot balancing on my feet. As my heart races I make a small jump onto the back of one of the horses. As soon as I land on the horse I feel my heart beat slowly adjust back to normal. I wave to the roaring crowd who seems to have love my little stunt.

The horse doesn't seem too affected by the fact it is now carrying a teenage boy on its back and soon arrives in line with all the other Chariots. Almost by instinct I find my eyes landing on District Three. Jean.

What a coincidence. Such a large chance that the same year I am reaped a random boy I have never met has the same name as my best friend, the person I am closest too. He knows all of my secrets, even the ones I am not too proud of.

_With the darkness acting as my guide and my speed and swift movement acquired from all the tricks and stunts I easily make it out of the home within ten minutes. They won't even notice the missing cash. It wasn't a lot, only some to buy some food until my father gets paid again. I work out in the fields but we needed the money to pay for a leaking pipe. We had no choice, not that he will know how I got this money. I will tell him a got a small bonus working in the grain fields._

_ I feel my heart racing as I slip off the property and onto the street running and running the only thing running through my head is the directions to the place I told Jean to meet me at. For once I don't enjoy this adrenaline rush, if anything it sends me into an even darker place._

_ How could I do this?_

_ Oh but I know how I could do this. By having no mother to provide a second income and being as poor as dirt in a District that is so unforgiving. It is just my father and I and I won't let us starve. I rather feel this guilt._

_ They won't miss the money; it probably is like a penny to them._

_ "Micah?" I hear Jean's voice reach me as I walk into an alleyway in the edge of town. I am breathless from fear. "Micah are you okay?" He asks going forward to catch me if I am to faint or simply to just fall over. _

_ I nod._

_ "Did they see you?" He asks?_

_ I shake my head starting to regain myself as I stand up again. Jean doesn't have much emotion on his face but I know he is there for me. He isn't going to judge me, we will both forget this ever happened and go on to plan some other stunt for me to preform. This will be forgotten. It needs to be forgotten, and hopefully it will never happen again._

The memory poking at the edges of my brain makes my goofy smile waver as I try to make myself cheer up with no avail. I don't like to think about things like that, what I have to do to survive. It only happened once more, when I was near starving. Just twice. I am not criminal, I am not innocent either but I am not a thug.

I continue to wave to the crowd looking away from District Three Jean. It isn't my friend, they don't even look alike. They just have the same name.

I look to President Snow as he looks over us all, doing a double take on me before looking to the crowd.

"Let the 62nd Hunger Games begin!"

* * *

I know the schedule hasn't worked out exactly yet, but trust me I will get it working. It might end up just being Mondays and Fridays and Wednesdays once and a while but I will get into the schedule. I just need a little time to get use to it.

OK this is VERY IMPORTANT- One please vote on the poll on my profile for your favorite tribute. You can pick five people.

Two- I am sorry I can't explain the entire story of why (I will explain more later) but I really want to make a GIANT retcon… which means changing something earlier established in the story. Okay not exactly but I want to make a HUGE change that might really confuse a lot of you but I think most of you won't care. I want to change the Victor to the 60th Hunger Games. Does it sound seriously drastic? Well I am really considering it. I will explain more in the next chapter that will tie everything together.


	8. Chapter 8 Training Day One pt 1

**Chapter Eight: Training Day One pt. 1**

**District Four**

**Caleb Depths, 18**

I dream of the ocean, I dream of it washing over me. Tangling itself around me and pulling me away into the darkness. Locking me in. The sound of the crashing waves rushing in my ears as I panic for air.

A tribute from District Four with a fear of water, that will do me good. I use to love it, crave every moment I could have the smooth water over my skin. Now it just pushes all those memories back into my thoughts. It makes me cold and dark, like the sea has swept up all the light.

I guess being in this place brings out the worse of it from me. All the ghost of tributes who came in so confidently after so long of training just to be killed. Or a Victor, but I have known stories of all the light taken away from the Victors. The price of Victory not worth it and most definitely not what they expected. I knew that for a while but it never mattered; now I recognize it. But my light is all gone anyway; they can't take that away from me. That is why I am here, that security of having little to loose is so comforting. It pushes and fuels me.

Once I am fully awake I manage to get out of the comforting bed and answer the door to my escort who stands with folded clothes that she shoves into my hands before turning away with the fleeting words of, "Breakfast in five, be ready."

I sigh tiredly and shake my head to get myself moving. The clothes she gave me are nothing special. A black form fitting shirt and black pants that allow just the right amount of movement and finally sneakers. The morning moves fast, pausing every now and then to allow me to think. Between those moments I just watch it go by. I get ready, I eat breakfast, and then I prepare to go downstairs. Monica throws me flirtatious looks and comments, pushing herself as close to me as possible. She is beautiful no doubt, but she is rather annoying. Even if she wasn't I am not interested, I don't feel like getting close to a girl just for her to die or stab me in the back in my sleep. It just wouldn't end up well.

"Caleb do you just not like to talk or something?" Monica asks me folding her arms as the elevator shoots down. In a matter of seconds we reach the training floor.

"What made you think that?" I say before walking out of the elevator into the training center. It is astonishing really, so sleek and beyond what you could imagine. I say that coming from training too, but District Four's training center doesn't compare. I guess the Capitol would never let itself be outdone. I see a few tributes already here. They all seem so rushed. Like if they slow done training will just slip away with them knowing nothing and basically left to just rot in the Arena. I don't blame them, I can't imagine going into this with nothing. I guess I have my mom to thank for forcing me to train. Well not exactly _forcing _more like encouraging. She isn't too bad of a mother, she always accepted me. Accepted all the late nights when I enjoy partying and having fun drinking. Then she accepted when I spent all my days in my room or training.

Monica links her arm with mine, she is persistent I must say. I doubt she really is looking for anything more than someone to flirt with and get some attention from before the Game. Which is why I cannot become too close to her.

"Too bad they don't have a pool in here for swimming, I could really go for a swim." Monica stats, twirling her hair as we look around the room.

"Yeah," I say wanting the subject to be over with.

"He is even better looking in person." Monica suddenly says with a smirk. I turn around to follow her line of vision to the male of District Two.

"Ok, why don't you talk to him?" I say as I remove myself from her and start towards the spear section of the training center where the only person there is just that girl from Twelve who just stands motionlessly looking at the spear's tip.

I give a glance to the tributes from the Career Districts. District Two had just arrived as Monica had noticed, but Monica just places herself near the male not speaking. The female is already heading towards the weapons. She worries me; she looks as intimidating as the male. Well not intimidating, more like a potential obstacle. The tributes from One are together but don't look interested in each other. They are making fires.

Just as I turn back to the spears I see Monica blocking my way. I swear to god does she plan on doing this the entire time?

* * *

** District One**

**Ecstasy, 17**

I twirl a strand of hair that was loose from the tight braid my stylist gave me and watch from a distance as Monica from District Four wraps her arm around her district partner's neck with a smirk. He doesn't seem too interested and just looks bluntly ahead.

"So how are you two little District Partners doing?" A voice says from behind Burgundy and I. Turning around I see the District Two male, Malice standing with his hands on the table behind us looking straight ahead to Monica and Caleb. In the background I can see his District Partner, Alexis, warming up with the weapons. So is this it? This is where we all get together and become Careers? So early on in the day too. I figured it would happen, especially since everyone from those District seem willing to join the Careers but I just couldn't really imagine how it would go.

"Fine," Burgundy says for the both of us. I don't think we are friends, but he reminds me of home and all so we just stick around each other. We haven't even really talked much since the Train Rides.

"Didn't think you could just start making alliances without District Four did you?" Turning back to where we were looking before I see Monica standing with her head held high and her hands on her hip. She is a spoiled brat yes, but it isn't anything I haven't seen before or anything I haven't had to deal with before. Caleb trails behind her.

"Just introducing myself sweetheart." Malice spits almost coldly.

"Ugh we have only three days of Training, lets get past that shall we?" She says folding her arms. "We all know who each others names so lets just keep it at that okay?" She paces over to the other side of the table to Malice. Burgundy and I were just sitting down to take a little rest before we get back to training but it looks like our plans are going to be shifted just a bit. "Now is that okay with you?" Monica says resting her polished hand on Malice's shoulder flirtatiously. Much to my pleasure I see the zero effect it has on Malice as he shrugs her hand off and stands up straight as Caleb approaches.

"So are we all going to be allying then?" Malice says.

No one says anything to reject the ideas, so of course Monica speaks up. I have a feeling that will be happening a lot. Maybe if it wasn't for the fact I had gotten so focused with what I could do to give myself a little kick I would've ended up like her, but I choose the path of a hollowed out druggie and she choose the path of a spoiled brat. We really weren't given too much of different lives, both of our father's being Victors. But we are two complete different people.

"Sounds great, _sweetheart._" Monica says with a rather annoying drawl.

"What about Alexis then?" I ask glancing at her still focusing on hitting each and every one of her targets.

"Don't worry she is going to be with us, we are going to have a full six person group this year, and to avoid any annoyances if you all don't mind I would prefer if we kept things to the classics." He says referring to the usual Career Districts.

"Whatever you say darling." Monica says flipping her hair as Caleb tries to avoid her flying golden hair from hitting him square in the face. Such a lovely group of people.

* * *

**District Eight**

**Than, 18**

I never really had too much of an understanding why I take a liking to certain people or an interest, suddenly I can just feel a little emotion at the pit of my stomach. Curiosity. Usually when that happens it means the person has a dark tendency of sorts, whatever that means. I just define it as someone with similarities to my friends and me. In a way it is almost as if it is just my basic instinct to find someone like me. Isn't that how humans like it? We don't want clones of ourselves no that would be too strange.

But we take comfort in similarities. That is how it always has been; it isn't something you can really change.

For some reason I have taken an interest in Cara, which fills me with even more interest because I have trouble seeing where our similarities lye. She seems strange, in a slight unsettling way. But I can tell just slightly what her personality is like from last night. She and Elian didn't smile on their Chariots, and when she was yelled at. She is independent and maybe a bit of anger issue but she doesn't frighten me. I want to see if I am right, if she is all the things I think she is and if there is something beneath the cover. I want to know. I need to know.

I walk over from the fire starting station leaving the District Ten girl by herself. Cara is handling a knife, looking at it from each and every angle.

"Hello," I say once I reach her. I stand behind her, in her blind spot. She jumps and drops the knife in her hands. It clatters against the tile and a few eyes direct themselves to us, so I just stand there with one hand on the table next to Cara as she just continues to twist her body to look up at me in shock.

"Who are you?" She asks.

"Than," I say moving around to stand in front of her. Soon everyone goes back to what they are doing.

"From Eight." She says. She tries to be discreet as she steps backs trying to put a little distance between us.

I nod, "And you are Cara from Distirct Six." I say allowing her to have her distance; I don't want to throw her off.

"So Than didn't your mother ever tell you it isn't good to sneak up on people like that?" She asks sarcastically.

"I don't have a mother." I say and she gives a nod looking unsure of what to say back to that.

Before she has time to say anything the alarm goes off signaling it is time for lunch. We both glance towards the door that leads toward the cafeteria. "How about we eat lunch together then?" I ask.

She pauses momentarily before taking in a breath and stepping in the direction of the cafeteria. "Sorry but I think it would be best if I ate alone." She says before turning around and starts walking for a second before turning back around. "And I am sorry about your mother." She says awkwardly before turning around once more to walk towards the cafeteria. She leaves me standing here. I guess this should be expected. She reeks of a need to be independent. Naturally she would turn down my offer.

But it would be a shame to give up so easily, forcing her into an alliance no. But I will just have to get her to trust me. I didn't want an ally at first, if anything someone I could keep around just for a little while before slitting their throat in their sleep but maybe a partner in crime would work best. I don't know how the others at the orphanage would react to Cara, if she was at the orphanage back long ago when there were others, but I don't think we would've killed her.

That just has to be enough now to forge some kind of alliance here, even if in the end not both of us will be getting out of that Arena alive.

* * *

**District Ten**

**Cavallo, 18**

"I still can't believe this." I say pacing back and forth as Rosie sits giving her best attempts for tying a knot. My long lost sister sits in front of me. Well not full sister, which luckily enough separates our last names just by the slightest. I already told Rosie they can't know we are siblings yet, maybe later on but for now it needs to be a mystery.

"It sure is unexpected, but I knew I would see you again. I was so happy to see your face on that screen… I just knew it was you. Then it settled in what it meant." She says her wide smile turning into a frown. I don't want her to cry, she cried the other night when we first said hello. I waited though so the other tributes didn't see us reuniting. I just went with Rosie to her floor. I didn't really care if Micah knew. He seems cool enough.

"I know but this has to be good! I can protect you from them now Rosie, I am older and stronger than a lot of them. I will keep you safe." I don't know exactly what will happen when the numbers get smaller, or if I need to make a decision between my life and hers. I don't need to yet, for now I am just going to do my best to give her a chance she would have never had without me.

She smiles at me, "I just wish two people could win." She is too naïve to think that way though. She must realize she has little chance on her own but like back then before she and her mother moved away she was just so naïve and I guess not much has changed since then. For now that will be best, I can shield her from things. I want her to stay as innocent as possible. Even if that is just as naïve of thinking.

I see Rosie readjust her eyes to something behind me and turn around to see the male tribute from Eleven walks past us to join us at the knotting station. He glances at us and gives a small nod and neutral smile before turning to the knots instructor. I watch him for a little while as Rosie continues to knot. He doesn't seem too bad, like a good enough of a guy. Can I trust him though? As much as I like to think I can do this with just Rosie and I, an alliance would do me good. I have people skills and sadly watching over Rosie will only make things harder in the Arena. An extra pair of able eyes would be perfect.

He talks to the instructor for a while and I half work on learning to build a knot that can trap tributes while I watch him from the corner of my eye. He talks to the instructor for a bit before taking his rope and turning away and moving a small distance to sit on the floor and work. Then I just wait for an opportunity.

He gives a little bit of a frustrated look as he works. "They look so much easier than they really are right?" I say to him and he looks up at the two of us and nods.

"Yeah," he says.

"Which one are you working on?" Rosie asks, thank goodness for her bubbly nature.

"The snare," he says. He glances down at our own hands preoccupied with the knots. "And you two?"

Human interaction, regular awkward human interaction. I guess it is hard to imagine. Hard to imagine all sorts of people from different Districts, different lives all that are going through the same thing who are destined to kill each other talking like normal human beings.

"Fishing net." Rosie says brightly. "But it isn't going to good." She says looking down with slight disappointment.

"I guess that is why we are here though, what would be the point of Training if we were all already expert assassins and skilled survivalist?" He says, definitely glad I talked to him. Lets just hope he has some sense of loyalty. I don't want to be killed in my sleep.

"Unlike a few…" I say jokingly slowly glancing to where the Careers are starting to gather together. They both chuckle a little bit.

Harsh smiles, "Yeah."

* * *

**District Five**

**Fennec Gray, 14**

I stare down at all the options of food near drooling at all the wonderful smells.

It wasn't like I ever was starving, withering away to bones. But it wasn't like I ever got three full meals everyday of the week, and none is this good. It is hard not to indulge myself. I guess that is best though, get some fat on me before I go into the Arena. That is what my mentor suggested, and she won not so long ago. I like her better than the male mentor, not like I don't dislike him but I get along better with the female mentor. Her name is Ada, she won the 60th Hunger Games.

I think why I like her so much is because she is someone I can look up to, in a strange way. She is smart and witty, that is how she won. That is how I plan to win. Because I know that even though I am just fourteen I am sure as hell much smarter than some of the people here. And wittier. Ada made the bomb that blew up the careers, and even then no one expected her to win. But she did.

I need to use that as proof that this is possible.

Sitting down from getting my second helping of food I start eating again, I spent the morning doing what I basically would be doing back home. Reading. Except now I read about different methods of starting fires, different plants and their uses, and all sorts of traps I could make. But I know just reading won't do me much good. I have soaked up the information and after lunch I will see what is has done for me. I don't plan on spending much time with weapons. What is the point? I don't plan to be getting in many battles and even if I do waste my time with weapons if someone tries to kill me and I try to fight back I will still get slaughtered.

"Mind if I sit here?" A voice says and I look up from my plate, Aeron is standing in front of me with a plate of food in his hands.

"Uh…" I say not wanting much to do with him. I might have an easier time talking to someone else but Aeron and I don't get along much even though we are from the same District, he is creepy. And it is almost like I can see him staring at me out of the corner of my eye constantly. I need to push him away, it is what I did home. I am almost professional by now. Not many people want anything to do with me anyway, but that is okay. I invent, I calculate, and do any sort of thing involving thinking to waste my time. I do fine without many friends.

"Is someone sitting here?" He asks me not even flinching by the fact all I said wasn't even a real word.

"Yes," I respond. I know it won't do much good, but maybe he will just give up and I walk away. I don't want to rude, don't want to make an enemy with this guy. Especially since he is probably a psychopath.

The strange thing when I see him around other people, he acts _normal. _Then around me he is freaky.

"Well then how about I pull up a chair so whoever is sitting here can keep their chair?" He says and retrieves a chair from the table over. I let him, I won't push this any further. I need to be smart about this.

"So how has you day been going?" He asks with a charming smile, which does _not _suit him well. I am sure some people would think it does, but no matter what he does he gives me this icy feeling.

"Fine." I say looking down at my plate to start eating again.

"Made any friends?"

"Not really."

"I think I did, the girl from District Three I talked to for a bit. Along with the one from Twelve." He says and I glance at them from behind us. Twelve is on her own, I wonder what Aeron was talking to her about. The girl from Three is sitting with the male tribute from Nine who looks rather uninterested in her. I don't think they will make an alliance.

"Nice," I say quietly as I look back to my plate. Even if Aeron and I weren't in the Hunger Games and he wasn't really creepy I can't imagine our conversation going much further. I am deadly shy, and awkward. Which probably isn't going to help for Sponsors, but if I spend my time here well then I can make my own supplies.

"I think the girl from Three, Mae, might be a possible ally but I don't think Ash from Twelve likes me much. She sort of pushed me away." Aeron says.

I am silent, debating what to respond with. Finally I just say what is itching me away at the back of my head. "Why are you telling me this?"

"I want to be in an alliance, we both are from Five why not?" He asks.

No way in hell.

"Um, sorry but I just think… I just think it would be best if I did this on my own." I say looking down. I can see him frown and get up; his charming aura replaced with once again the unsettling one I have seen for the last day.

"Fine," he says walking away. I don't watch him leave to see where he goes. I just let out a groan holding my head in my hands and try not to worry about the fact I think I just made an enemy.

* * *

**District Five Mentor **

**Ada Linus, 20**

_I see Isaac finish off Beth, he isn't evil. He has a conscious. He will feel remorse for killing a girl who is just 14, this is when I need to move in, Coraline has died. I hear her cannon. Now Beth's cannon has erupted through the Arena. Just Isaac and me. I don't even take a second to consider what things would have been like if I hadn't gotten the Careers all to die in the bomb. Or if I had gotten captured, but luckily I planted the bomb and escapes in enough time. _

_ I have my dagger in my fingers; I found it in the leftovers from the explosion. It was disturbing to be there on the dark ground where so many teenagers had died and know that it was my doing, but I got over it. I moved on. I need to move, it is what I have been doing ever since I got into this hellhole._

_ Approaching up the hill I try to be as stealthy as possible. I am going to become a killer, not just setting off a bomb to kill people but actually using a weapon to kill someone. To feel them die as I hold this dagger in their back._

_ I take a breath and approach behind Isaac, he is on the ground. He looks like his mental stability has been demolished. He will be up again in a second and looking for me. So I run forward and stab the dagger into his back and kick him with all the force I have back so I have enough time to run as far as I can from him. He will die soon, but until then. Until I hear his cannon and am told I am the new Victor I will keep alert. It is what he didn't do and in the end what killed him._

_ He doesn't try to come and kill me. I am behind the Cornucopia, which survived the explosion, and after what seems like ages I hear the cannon and the three teenagers faces in the sky that just died as I am announced the Victor of the 60__th__ Hunger Games._

_ I am the Victor, I won._

_ I won._

I wait until the Elevator doors open to get into the Elevator. I have so much to do. My head is swirling with activity. Memories flushing back in. This is where my life was destroyed after all. Now I get to go to the area where I watched both Leon and Theresa die.

Life as a Victor never seems to let me down with the new types of unfortunate things that can happen to me. I was supposed to be happy when I got back to District Five. I had Herman. My best friend who I had to realize I had feelings for a little too late. I had my father. I had my life. But in my head I knew that was all too good to be true, it was all a fairytale. I had those things but I had baggage. I am a murderer and I couldn't get over my time in the Arena. They gave me those stupid extensions that I just couldn't stand. I had nightmares, as much as I was glad to be with Herman I couldn't see how he would want a killer. Just when I was starting to get comfortable, allowing our relationship to grow stronger and things were getting better (I even had Herman cut out those awful extensions, though he did give me a rather choppier haircut than I wanted but that didn't bother me) my father died of heart problems.

I didn't even know he was sick.

Seven more months after I had become Victor he died.

Then I was a mentor and both of my tributes did awful, not even making it past the first night. I got lost.

I almost committed suicide a few times, well had thoughts of it. But that would be cowardly. I didn't take Isaac's life just to waste my own.

Now I am here. I have a group of tributes I think could actually go past the first night, an older capable looking male and a smart fourteen-year-old girl. I don't think my fellow mentor was happy to see someone so young, but I don't doubt her. Beth came so close to Victory and so did Siva last year, and Siva was just twelve.

Once I am downstairs in the "mentor" room I begin to start working. It isn't anything special, a lounge room with computers and other technology. This is where mentor can watch their tributes once the Games starts and for today while Fennec and Aeron are training I am going to be doing a little research on what the public thinks of them.

The only other group here is the mentors from District Eight. Rhett Evers. She won last year. I don't know why her parents named her Rhett, since that is a boy name and all. But in a way I can sympathize with her. We are both recent Victors, I was her a year ago. And in a way we both have something the other doesn't. I have Herman, who I confessed to liking in my Interviews and she lost Roman. They were never together really, but it is obvious she had feelings for him. And she still has her dad Tom Evers, who suffered from a heart attack. Heart problems also, he would be dead if it weren't for the fact he is a Victor. My father is dead because he is just a simple man from District Five no one cared about.

She is with the new male mentor, one replacing her father who still is suffering from heart issues. Cyrus I believe is his name. He is the same age as me, he won so young.

For a moment I am tempted to talk to her, but I don't need to think much about it because when she sees me she gets up and starts walking in my direction leaving Cyrus sitting down by himself.

"Hey," she says when she reaches me. She looks tired.

I nod, "hello."

"I know we are sort of competing against each other, since we both want our own tributes to do best but I felt like it would be appropriate to talk. Since we won after each other and all." She says. I am unsure what she wants to talk about, but as shy as I am I will try to have some kind of conversation with her. "I just guess I want to know how to survive this, I guess." She says.

So I guess that is why, she wants to know how I got through it last year. She is different than the girl I saw on the screen. It is like her pride and dignity has been taken away, in a way I guess it has.

"Sure but to be honest I haven't figured it out yet." I say.

"That is why I want to talk."

* * *

So that is part one of Training Day One :) Right on time as always! … okay more like a month late. I am sorry. I just don't know what happened to be honest, I guess Fanfiction just wasn't important for me over the last month and so much has happened I just want to go back to how things were a year ago when I could update every single day. Hopefully you guys haven't given up on me. For those who haven't feel free to vote in the poll for your favorite tribute so far if you haven't already. Okay more like favorite five tributes XD


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